It's been over 2 years since my last post...I didn't even remember how to....
Well. I had my baby - my 3rd boy...all now are ages 13, 12 and 2...crazy!
I am recently separated - plan on filing for divorce in the forseeable furture.
I figured why just read about my friend's life in her blog (thebeanblog), although it does help me keep in touch with her life, when I could also be chronicling mine...and how much it sucks!!!!!
So, I'M BAAAAACCCKKKK!!!!
I'm always asking myself (or anyone who will listen), "it is just me or...? Here I can fill in the blanks to that question all the while reassuring (even if only in my own mind) that of course I was right. Oh and perhaps this "blogging" will keep me sane with my hectic life of as a wife and mom to three boys.
Saturday, March 31, 2007
Wednesday, December 15, 2004
Brothers & Sisters Club
I took the boys to a Brothers & Sisters Club class at the hospital tonight and boy am I SO glad we went. I was hesitant when I first signed up because she said the next oldest child in the class that night was 8 and the age ranges were 3 - 8 years old. I started to think my boys would feel really out of place. We were actually supposed to go last Wednesday and then Dallas got sick so we rescheduled for this Wednesday. I tried to give the boys an out on whether they even wanted me to reschedule or not and they did. I'm glad we were in tonight's class because there were 10 kids all together and there were a couple other boys around their age.
They really enjoyed it. We were supposed to bring baby pictures of themselves so when we first got there they took those and put an ID bracelet on them just like the one the baby will have when it's born. They got an activity book where they could write a story about their own birth. It was fill in the blank so they'd have to ask mom & dad questions. There were pages to color and word games of baby related words, dot to dot, pages where they could put their baby picture, a picture of the new baby when it comes and a picture of them with the baby (again when it comes) all in a row on a page. And above that is a guest book page where they can have the people who visit us at the hospital sign in. They got finger printed on a sticker and that went on a page along with the ID bracelet they got. There was a page to put a certificate they got for attending the class.
They had all the kids sit on the floor and these 2 nurses first showed the baby pictures every one had brought and talked about how different those babies look compared to how the kids look now. All the things the babies in those pictures couldn't do yet or do for themselves that others would have to do for them, etc. They showed life size pictures of what a woman's body looks like on the inside before and during pregnancy. They asked the kids to point out and name things on the pictures. Real names too like uterus and umbilical cord. They talked about things the baby does and goes through while it's in the uterus. I was really proud of my boys, they participating a lot in the discussion and always raised their hand. Unlike a couple other younger kids who talked NONSTOP!
Then we went to a birthing room and they explained the monitors and the birthing bed. Took it apart, pulled out the stirrups. Talked about contractions and pushing. Showed the warming tables they put the babies in to clean them up and check out their heart, give them some air, check length and weight. Showed them how after mommy has gotten up for a bit, they pull down a queen size bed out of the wall for her to sleep in the rest of the time. Showed the refrigerators, tv's and vcrs in the room for when kids come to visit mommy and baby. They showed the little kitchen where there is pop, juice, and snacks for the families.
It got REALLY interesting when we went back to the classroom. First they had some formula for them to try. That was priceless! I took pictures of Brendon and Dallas just as they were taking the sips. I know Brendon's face was already curdling so I hope the shot is good. I couldn't take any more of their after reactions because they both starting gagging and I totally thought they both were going to throw up right there. It was hilarious!!! Then they got to change a diaper on a practice baby. They had to hold the baby then lay out a blanket, undress it and change the diaper. That was great and you know what - they really enjoyed it. They took right too it. I took several pictures of them changing their babies. And the nurse took one of all of us together. At one point Dallas had his baby standing on it's head either moving the diaper forward or putting the legs back in the sleeper. It was funny! Then they picked them up and held them. I got a picture of that too. I really wish we had a digital camera so I could include the pictures right now but it will have to wait for traditional old developing which probably won't be 'til after the baby comes and we finish up the role.
Like I said, I am SO glad I took them. Dallas told me after we got in the car that now that he went to that he is really excited for the baby to be here and Brendon said he was too. That was so great to hear. We had a really good night.
We used the same babies for breastfeeding class the night before and you know, they were actually pretty heavy. Each baby doll had a bracelet with it's name and weight. Mine last night was 6 lbs, 8 ozs (right near our baby's estimated weight) and I thought man this feels heavy. When I asked the instructor she said they actually probably weigh a couple lbs more because of how they are weighted - all in the body and not in the head and limbs. The boys' babies tonight were both over 8 lbs so they were actually handling like a 10 lb baby.
On the regular baby front, I have my last ob check tomorrow. The day after that (Friday, 12/17/04) will be my last day at work. I decided to take Monday the 20th off since Ken did and we'll need that day to prepare ourselves and to be together. Ken & I - AND all of us as a family.
If I don't post before then, we'll let you all know when baby is here and the particulars on weight and stuff.
Until next time...
Baby's Due Date
They really enjoyed it. We were supposed to bring baby pictures of themselves so when we first got there they took those and put an ID bracelet on them just like the one the baby will have when it's born. They got an activity book where they could write a story about their own birth. It was fill in the blank so they'd have to ask mom & dad questions. There were pages to color and word games of baby related words, dot to dot, pages where they could put their baby picture, a picture of the new baby when it comes and a picture of them with the baby (again when it comes) all in a row on a page. And above that is a guest book page where they can have the people who visit us at the hospital sign in. They got finger printed on a sticker and that went on a page along with the ID bracelet they got. There was a page to put a certificate they got for attending the class.
They had all the kids sit on the floor and these 2 nurses first showed the baby pictures every one had brought and talked about how different those babies look compared to how the kids look now. All the things the babies in those pictures couldn't do yet or do for themselves that others would have to do for them, etc. They showed life size pictures of what a woman's body looks like on the inside before and during pregnancy. They asked the kids to point out and name things on the pictures. Real names too like uterus and umbilical cord. They talked about things the baby does and goes through while it's in the uterus. I was really proud of my boys, they participating a lot in the discussion and always raised their hand. Unlike a couple other younger kids who talked NONSTOP!
Then we went to a birthing room and they explained the monitors and the birthing bed. Took it apart, pulled out the stirrups. Talked about contractions and pushing. Showed the warming tables they put the babies in to clean them up and check out their heart, give them some air, check length and weight. Showed them how after mommy has gotten up for a bit, they pull down a queen size bed out of the wall for her to sleep in the rest of the time. Showed the refrigerators, tv's and vcrs in the room for when kids come to visit mommy and baby. They showed the little kitchen where there is pop, juice, and snacks for the families.
It got REALLY interesting when we went back to the classroom. First they had some formula for them to try. That was priceless! I took pictures of Brendon and Dallas just as they were taking the sips. I know Brendon's face was already curdling so I hope the shot is good. I couldn't take any more of their after reactions because they both starting gagging and I totally thought they both were going to throw up right there. It was hilarious!!! Then they got to change a diaper on a practice baby. They had to hold the baby then lay out a blanket, undress it and change the diaper. That was great and you know what - they really enjoyed it. They took right too it. I took several pictures of them changing their babies. And the nurse took one of all of us together. At one point Dallas had his baby standing on it's head either moving the diaper forward or putting the legs back in the sleeper. It was funny! Then they picked them up and held them. I got a picture of that too. I really wish we had a digital camera so I could include the pictures right now but it will have to wait for traditional old developing which probably won't be 'til after the baby comes and we finish up the role.
Like I said, I am SO glad I took them. Dallas told me after we got in the car that now that he went to that he is really excited for the baby to be here and Brendon said he was too. That was so great to hear. We had a really good night.
We used the same babies for breastfeeding class the night before and you know, they were actually pretty heavy. Each baby doll had a bracelet with it's name and weight. Mine last night was 6 lbs, 8 ozs (right near our baby's estimated weight) and I thought man this feels heavy. When I asked the instructor she said they actually probably weigh a couple lbs more because of how they are weighted - all in the body and not in the head and limbs. The boys' babies tonight were both over 8 lbs so they were actually handling like a 10 lb baby.
On the regular baby front, I have my last ob check tomorrow. The day after that (Friday, 12/17/04) will be my last day at work. I decided to take Monday the 20th off since Ken did and we'll need that day to prepare ourselves and to be together. Ken & I - AND all of us as a family.
If I don't post before then, we'll let you all know when baby is here and the particulars on weight and stuff.
Until next time...

Wednesday, December 08, 2004
clean bill of health
Had our last u/s today. As you know, back in September we had that scare that we could be facing a possible heart or chromosone defect and had a Level 2 ultrasound. That ultrasound was fine for the heart and/or chromosones - they didn't see anything at all. But in one picture they got an enlarged left kidney. So, we've had this 2nd Level 2 ultrasound scheduled since then so that they could check before delivery and know if there was going to be anything they needed to do at delivery. GREAT NEWS...we got a clean bill of health. Nothing at all wrong with the kidneys and although they couldn't get a great look at the heart (baby is where it should be - head down, facing backwards - making it difficult to see) - they agree with the more detailed look back in Sept - no defects! We are right on schedule for everything to progress with no problems.
They estimated the baby's weight at 6 lbs 4 oz and average is 6 lbs 5 oz for 37 weeks. So much for our dr thinking it will be bigger than average. Of course I still have 12 days 'til sched c-section (no counting today as a day anymore) so it will still gain but I think we'll be right in there at 7 - 8 lbs. I think I was saying before that Brendon was like 7 lbs 6 oz and Dallas was like 6 lbs 9 oz.
Speaking of boys...I told the tech if she wanted to triple check the sex she could. There was a moment of silence so I said, "we've already been told a boy...", she interrupted me to say, "I was just going to say I hope you were told a boy". So, it didn't fall off in the last couple months! JUST KIDDING! Yes, I wanted a girl having already had the 2 boys but I love this baby no matter what and I can't wait for him to be here with us.
I'm just so happy that will all the scares and bumps we've had along the way that we are just 12 days away from having our little bundle! YEAH!!!!!!!!
Baby's Due Date
They estimated the baby's weight at 6 lbs 4 oz and average is 6 lbs 5 oz for 37 weeks. So much for our dr thinking it will be bigger than average. Of course I still have 12 days 'til sched c-section (no counting today as a day anymore) so it will still gain but I think we'll be right in there at 7 - 8 lbs. I think I was saying before that Brendon was like 7 lbs 6 oz and Dallas was like 6 lbs 9 oz.
Speaking of boys...I told the tech if she wanted to triple check the sex she could. There was a moment of silence so I said, "we've already been told a boy...", she interrupted me to say, "I was just going to say I hope you were told a boy". So, it didn't fall off in the last couple months! JUST KIDDING! Yes, I wanted a girl having already had the 2 boys but I love this baby no matter what and I can't wait for him to be here with us.
I'm just so happy that will all the scares and bumps we've had along the way that we are just 12 days away from having our little bundle! YEAH!!!!!!!!

Monday, December 06, 2004
My other shower...
Had my other shower Sunday, thrown by Stacy. Lots of people and tons of stuff. Some of you did way too much (and you know who you are) !
I got all of this:
pacifiers (3 sets)
socks (3 sets)
bottles (4 sets)
bibs (4 sets)
rattles (3 including the 2 on the cake)
receiving blankets (3 sets)
onzies (3 sets)
teether (vibrating even)
Destin
baby shampoo
nightime bath & lotion
sleepers (about 8)
Snoopy diaper bag
nasal aspirator (or "booger getter")
baby nail clippers
bottle/nipple brush
tie (or no sew) baby blanket
My 1st Teddy stuffed animal
diapers (3 packages, size 1)
fleece blanket
night light
sippy cups
wash clothes
t-shirts (not onzies)
feeding spoons
eculyptus/menthol baby wash & lotion
baby powder
wet wipes
Nike sweatsuit
vibrating bouncer seat w/attached toys & blanket
Like I said, a TON of stuff!!
We also finally got the baby's room all cleaned out and Ken & his dad put the crib and changing table together yesterday. While cleaning out that room I came across the curtains my mom made when Brendon was born so we decided to use those so this baby will have the same curtains the boys did when they were babies. We haven't gotten everything put away in there yet because we still need to scrub the walls and decide if we need to paint. Soon though!
Basically though now if we should have this baby early, at least we have everything we need to start. Everything else is just stocking up on extras. What a relief!!! Probably more so for Ken than me since someone would of had to take him shopping if anything had happened before my shower.
The boys have been really funny. They both liked the tie baby blanket Aunt Chris made so now they each want one for themselves. I said we'd see if Aunt Chris would have time to make them each one for Christmas. We went out to Hancock Fabrics today they picked out some Iowa (Hawkeye that is not farmland, cows or pigs or something) fleece material. They'll look cool but ummm - they weren't cheap! They also both have been playing with the vibrating teether Jaci, Mike and Tyler got us. I caught Brendon several times biting on it himself to feel it vibrate. That both actually said they each want one as a stocking stuffer. I'm going to do it as a joke! To top that, I also caught Brendon sitting in the car seat once! They are so funny!
Thanks again to everyone for the generousity, kindness, concern and friendship!
Baby's Due Date
I got all of this:
pacifiers (3 sets)
socks (3 sets)
bottles (4 sets)
bibs (4 sets)
rattles (3 including the 2 on the cake)
receiving blankets (3 sets)
onzies (3 sets)
teether (vibrating even)
Destin
baby shampoo
nightime bath & lotion
sleepers (about 8)
Snoopy diaper bag
nasal aspirator (or "booger getter")
baby nail clippers
bottle/nipple brush
tie (or no sew) baby blanket
My 1st Teddy stuffed animal
diapers (3 packages, size 1)
fleece blanket
night light
sippy cups
wash clothes
t-shirts (not onzies)
feeding spoons
eculyptus/menthol baby wash & lotion
baby powder
wet wipes
Nike sweatsuit
vibrating bouncer seat w/attached toys & blanket
Like I said, a TON of stuff!!
We also finally got the baby's room all cleaned out and Ken & his dad put the crib and changing table together yesterday. While cleaning out that room I came across the curtains my mom made when Brendon was born so we decided to use those so this baby will have the same curtains the boys did when they were babies. We haven't gotten everything put away in there yet because we still need to scrub the walls and decide if we need to paint. Soon though!
Basically though now if we should have this baby early, at least we have everything we need to start. Everything else is just stocking up on extras. What a relief!!! Probably more so for Ken than me since someone would of had to take him shopping if anything had happened before my shower.
The boys have been really funny. They both liked the tie baby blanket Aunt Chris made so now they each want one for themselves. I said we'd see if Aunt Chris would have time to make them each one for Christmas. We went out to Hancock Fabrics today they picked out some Iowa (Hawkeye that is not farmland, cows or pigs or something) fleece material. They'll look cool but ummm - they weren't cheap! They also both have been playing with the vibrating teether Jaci, Mike and Tyler got us. I caught Brendon several times biting on it himself to feel it vibrate. That both actually said they each want one as a stocking stuffer. I'm going to do it as a joke! To top that, I also caught Brendon sitting in the car seat once! They are so funny!
Thanks again to everyone for the generousity, kindness, concern and friendship!

Friday, December 03, 2004
Work Shower Today
They through me a shower at work today. Actually it was a pot luck so we had lots of good food!! I told them all how much I appreciated it even though I caught on that something was up. Hehe! It's really hard to pull off surprises so I relly do appreciate the effort!
So, we ate and played a couple games - had some cake and really awesome punch. Their gift was a money tree and it was so cute because all the money was tied on in bows of pink & blue yarn!!! That money was enough to pay for the swing, car seat and stroller I am getting from Stacy this weekend - with some left over to stock up on diapers or something.
The only thing I have bought is a few sleepers. Well, we did already buy Stacy's crib, changing table and dresser. My mom got us a new mattress then for the crib. My aunt sent up from Missouri a high chair and playpen. So that is a lot of the big stuff out of the way and off the mind!
My other shower is this Sunday. Can't wait to see everyone there and to see all the little precious stuff - this is the fun part - seeing all the cute stuff! Just waiting for the cute baby now!
Baby's Due Date
So, we ate and played a couple games - had some cake and really awesome punch. Their gift was a money tree and it was so cute because all the money was tied on in bows of pink & blue yarn!!! That money was enough to pay for the swing, car seat and stroller I am getting from Stacy this weekend - with some left over to stock up on diapers or something.
The only thing I have bought is a few sleepers. Well, we did already buy Stacy's crib, changing table and dresser. My mom got us a new mattress then for the crib. My aunt sent up from Missouri a high chair and playpen. So that is a lot of the big stuff out of the way and off the mind!
My other shower is this Sunday. Can't wait to see everyone there and to see all the little precious stuff - this is the fun part - seeing all the cute stuff! Just waiting for the cute baby now!

Wednesday, December 01, 2004
latest visit...
To the ob that is - not labor & delivery!
Nothing was really has changed...
...I gained a couple more pounds - nothing to fret over.
...the baby is head down now.
...I'm still measuring big so she said she thinks the baby will be bigger than average. That all depends on what average is, huh? Some of the stuff I've read online says 7 1/2 - 8 lbs at term is average but from hearing of friends' and friends of friends' babies birth weights, I really think 9 lbs is average anymore. So, I'm going to split the difference and say this baby will be 9 lbs are so. Maybe we should start a pool?! Some of you can even be brave and still guess girl if you want to! HA.
I had my Group B Strep test today. That was FUN!!! I won't go into details of how and where they take swabs from - that right there should be enough for you anyway. This test, for those that don't know, is now mandatory I believe to make sure a mother doesn't have a building staff infection that the baby could come into contact with at delivery. Staff infections can be dangerous to mother and child, although many times it just means antibiotics right away and possibly a little longer stay in the hospital. It probably won't really pertain to me since I am having a c-section rather than normal delivery but I am still glad they take the precaution.
Let's see...like I said, nothing else really. I go back next Thursday afternoon, the day after we have that next ultrasound, so hopefully we still have a clean bill of health then! Keep your fingers crossed!
Got my shower this weekend. I am SO excited to see all the little baby stuff! It's been hard waiting let me tell you! And we WILL have the baby's room all cleaned out by then to put all the stuff in. That is before Dallas' birthday party Saturday night. Phew - we have a busy weekend. That and a lot to do in the next 3 weeks (or less)!!!
Baby's Due Date
Nothing was really has changed...
...I gained a couple more pounds - nothing to fret over.
...the baby is head down now.
...I'm still measuring big so she said she thinks the baby will be bigger than average. That all depends on what average is, huh? Some of the stuff I've read online says 7 1/2 - 8 lbs at term is average but from hearing of friends' and friends of friends' babies birth weights, I really think 9 lbs is average anymore. So, I'm going to split the difference and say this baby will be 9 lbs are so. Maybe we should start a pool?! Some of you can even be brave and still guess girl if you want to! HA.
I had my Group B Strep test today. That was FUN!!! I won't go into details of how and where they take swabs from - that right there should be enough for you anyway. This test, for those that don't know, is now mandatory I believe to make sure a mother doesn't have a building staff infection that the baby could come into contact with at delivery. Staff infections can be dangerous to mother and child, although many times it just means antibiotics right away and possibly a little longer stay in the hospital. It probably won't really pertain to me since I am having a c-section rather than normal delivery but I am still glad they take the precaution.
Let's see...like I said, nothing else really. I go back next Thursday afternoon, the day after we have that next ultrasound, so hopefully we still have a clean bill of health then! Keep your fingers crossed!
Got my shower this weekend. I am SO excited to see all the little baby stuff! It's been hard waiting let me tell you! And we WILL have the baby's room all cleaned out by then to put all the stuff in. That is before Dallas' birthday party Saturday night. Phew - we have a busy weekend. That and a lot to do in the next 3 weeks (or less)!!!

Friday, November 26, 2004
ok - I like this one better...
new tickers
Tuesday, November 23, 2004
we have a date...
Just got back from the dr a little bit ago and we finally scheduled the c-section date. Neither Ken or I are thrilled with it but it is the earliest she would even consider based on my due to date. So, we are looking at Tuesday, Dec. 21st at 7:30 am (of course we have to be there at 5:00 am).
We really wanted either the 17th or the 20th so we'd be home in time for Christmas but, like I said, she wouldn't consider anything before the 21st. Which as Ken pointed out, we really don't know why she would be a stickler on that when she already said that if anything happened after 34 weeks, they'd go ahead and take the baby. If it's ok to take it now if something unforeseen happens, then why couldn't we fudge the schedule by a couple days?! Who knows?!
Anyway, she says we will get out on the 24th so at least we'll still have Christmas morning with the boys but probably won't be traveling to Worthington to see Ken's parents on Christmas Day like we usually do. We just better make sure we have all our Christmas shopping done by the 20th. Maybe we'll both take that day off for last minute shopping if we need to. HA. Funny, doing last minute shopping - all that walking - is what put me into labor with Dallas. His b-day is Dec. 9th.
But the good news is the boys are still in school through Dec. 22nd so we'll have all day at the hospital before we need to worry about getting them picked up. I told Ken I would have him pick them up at school that day and bring them to the hospital.
Otherwise, everything else is going fine. My weight was up to 14 lbs at my last appt but back down to 10 lbs at this one. She asked me how that happened and I told her my last appt was on my birthday and I'd been snacking ALL DAY LONG!!! Good thing I didn't go in yesterday when I had (4) desserts at our department lunch! (MAN, did I pay for that later!) She said the baby is really growing so we always like to hear that. No estimates on weight or anything and she never says how I'm measuring - except once she did say I'm always measuring bigger.
I go back on the 1st. We have the 2nd Level 2 ultrasound on Dec. 8th to check the baby's kidneys. I'm sure we'll get an estimate on size then - we have at the others. We're still pluggin' away.
Thanks for everyone's care, concern and prayers when they were needed. I can't wait to see this baby! Thanks for everything.
We really wanted either the 17th or the 20th so we'd be home in time for Christmas but, like I said, she wouldn't consider anything before the 21st. Which as Ken pointed out, we really don't know why she would be a stickler on that when she already said that if anything happened after 34 weeks, they'd go ahead and take the baby. If it's ok to take it now if something unforeseen happens, then why couldn't we fudge the schedule by a couple days?! Who knows?!
Anyway, she says we will get out on the 24th so at least we'll still have Christmas morning with the boys but probably won't be traveling to Worthington to see Ken's parents on Christmas Day like we usually do. We just better make sure we have all our Christmas shopping done by the 20th. Maybe we'll both take that day off for last minute shopping if we need to. HA. Funny, doing last minute shopping - all that walking - is what put me into labor with Dallas. His b-day is Dec. 9th.
But the good news is the boys are still in school through Dec. 22nd so we'll have all day at the hospital before we need to worry about getting them picked up. I told Ken I would have him pick them up at school that day and bring them to the hospital.
Otherwise, everything else is going fine. My weight was up to 14 lbs at my last appt but back down to 10 lbs at this one. She asked me how that happened and I told her my last appt was on my birthday and I'd been snacking ALL DAY LONG!!! Good thing I didn't go in yesterday when I had (4) desserts at our department lunch! (MAN, did I pay for that later!) She said the baby is really growing so we always like to hear that. No estimates on weight or anything and she never says how I'm measuring - except once she did say I'm always measuring bigger.
I go back on the 1st. We have the 2nd Level 2 ultrasound on Dec. 8th to check the baby's kidneys. I'm sure we'll get an estimate on size then - we have at the others. We're still pluggin' away.
Thanks for everyone's care, concern and prayers when they were needed. I can't wait to see this baby! Thanks for everything.
Friday, November 19, 2004
half days...
I am officially on 1/2 days through the end of my pregnancy. That is as of 1:00 am Friday morning when I left labor and deliver.
Dallas and I had gone to Walmart after school conference and within a few minutes my stomach started to hurt really bad. I could barely walk, I doubled over the cart handle a couple times. It hurt to bend or squat (like to pick something up). I got out of there as soon as I could after getting what I actually went for and called my mom on the way out the door to tell her I thought I'd be needing to bring the boys over and go to the hospital. I had picked up their supper so while they ate my plan was to lay down. The old ritual of...empty your bladder, drink 4 large glasses of water, lay on your left side and check for contractions - time them if any.
Really not long after getting home I was feeling better. It no longer hurt to walk or bend but I still laid down. I wasn't having any contractions but I wasn't feeling the baby move either. I had called Ken before I laid down and he was going to be calling to check on me at 8:15 pm break so I needed to decide what I was going to do. I called the hospital. They told me to keep doing what I had been doing, drink like 8 glasses of water, for another hour and call them back. I asked if I could have some apple juice too because I had wanted to do a kick count as well.
If you don't know what a kick count is...if you've haven't felt the baby move for a long time you are supposed to eat or drink something sugary, lay on your left side for one hour and count the kicks. You should feel 4 - 6 kicks in that hour. Once you have felt that many, you can stop counting but if you haven't felt that many in an hour, you are supposed to call you doctor.
Anyway, she said yes, I could throw in a glass of apple juice between my waters. In the 30 minutes following the apple juice I felt maybe 3 faint movements - no hard kicks. I called back and they said I needed more sugar. I was suppose to eat a candy bar and have a pop - Mt Dew. Like I need to be told to eat candy. I had already been using a bag of mint Hersey's Kisses to do kick counts earlier in the week. But we didn't have any pop with sugar. I buy for myself caffeine free diet pop so no kick there. The boys did have some Dr. Pepper but I can't stand it so Ken had to go get me a Mt. Dew. (Oh yeah, he had come home at that point...a little after 9:00 pm).
I called back at 11:00 pm and was only right at the minimum of 4 for the kick count for the hour and, again, they were faint not hard. They told me to come on in and get hooked up to a monitor.
After awhile the baby did really start to move a lot. I had a clicker in my hand that I was supposed to push the button when I felt it move. At one point it had the hiccups so I was clicking a lot then. HA. The nurse I had been talking to on the phone all night was who was checking on me at the hospital too, she came in and said everything was going good but my doctor was actually there for another delivery so she was trying to hold out to grab her from the OR to come see me. I was fine with waiting because if my doctor was right there then I wanted to see her too.
She came in a little before 1:00 am and checked my cervix. I still am not dilated at all which is good - let the baby cook in there a little longer - but she did decide to put me on 1/2 days the rest of the time.
I would love to work those 4 hrs in the afternoon and sleep in each day but since I still have to get the boys off to school, I can't really sleep in so I plan on taking them to school at 7:30 am and going to work from there. I guess my hours then would be something like 8:00 ish to noonish.
The good news is I found out that my secondary disability insurance that I took out a year before we even got pregnant because I knew there was a possibility I'd be off work, will not only pick up the difference in my pay for me working 1/2 time but they'll pay the full benefit of my policy which is $600 a month. WHAT A HUGE RELIEF!! I only have a little 40 hrs of vacation time and if AFLAC didn't kick in, I'd have to supplement this time off with vacation and even at that I would have to take some of it unpaid and we just can't afford that. So, now I will get full pay while working 1/2 days and not have to touch my vacation time. Well, except the 1st week waiting period but some of that falls over my paid holidays for Thanksgiving so I still won't have to use much.
I was supposed to go in for a check today anyway but since I saw my dr last night she told me to call in and reschedule that for Monday or Tuesday. I go then on Tuesday at 1:00 pm. I had asked her about traveling to Ken's aunt & uncle's for Thanksgiving and she said let's wait 'til that appt to decide. I think if as long I don't have any contractions between now and then she will be ok with it and she wants me to be able to lay down in the car. His aunt & uncle live in Elkader which Ken says is about an hour and a half away. I really hope I get to go. I have been looking forward to Thanksgiving dinner for WEEKS. If I can't go to Elkader I am having Thanksgiving someone here in town then because I am soooooooo hungry for it. Any offers? Just kidding.
So, once again, I'll keep you all posted.
Dallas and I had gone to Walmart after school conference and within a few minutes my stomach started to hurt really bad. I could barely walk, I doubled over the cart handle a couple times. It hurt to bend or squat (like to pick something up). I got out of there as soon as I could after getting what I actually went for and called my mom on the way out the door to tell her I thought I'd be needing to bring the boys over and go to the hospital. I had picked up their supper so while they ate my plan was to lay down. The old ritual of...empty your bladder, drink 4 large glasses of water, lay on your left side and check for contractions - time them if any.
Really not long after getting home I was feeling better. It no longer hurt to walk or bend but I still laid down. I wasn't having any contractions but I wasn't feeling the baby move either. I had called Ken before I laid down and he was going to be calling to check on me at 8:15 pm break so I needed to decide what I was going to do. I called the hospital. They told me to keep doing what I had been doing, drink like 8 glasses of water, for another hour and call them back. I asked if I could have some apple juice too because I had wanted to do a kick count as well.
If you don't know what a kick count is...if you've haven't felt the baby move for a long time you are supposed to eat or drink something sugary, lay on your left side for one hour and count the kicks. You should feel 4 - 6 kicks in that hour. Once you have felt that many, you can stop counting but if you haven't felt that many in an hour, you are supposed to call you doctor.
Anyway, she said yes, I could throw in a glass of apple juice between my waters. In the 30 minutes following the apple juice I felt maybe 3 faint movements - no hard kicks. I called back and they said I needed more sugar. I was suppose to eat a candy bar and have a pop - Mt Dew. Like I need to be told to eat candy. I had already been using a bag of mint Hersey's Kisses to do kick counts earlier in the week. But we didn't have any pop with sugar. I buy for myself caffeine free diet pop so no kick there. The boys did have some Dr. Pepper but I can't stand it so Ken had to go get me a Mt. Dew. (Oh yeah, he had come home at that point...a little after 9:00 pm).
I called back at 11:00 pm and was only right at the minimum of 4 for the kick count for the hour and, again, they were faint not hard. They told me to come on in and get hooked up to a monitor.
After awhile the baby did really start to move a lot. I had a clicker in my hand that I was supposed to push the button when I felt it move. At one point it had the hiccups so I was clicking a lot then. HA. The nurse I had been talking to on the phone all night was who was checking on me at the hospital too, she came in and said everything was going good but my doctor was actually there for another delivery so she was trying to hold out to grab her from the OR to come see me. I was fine with waiting because if my doctor was right there then I wanted to see her too.
She came in a little before 1:00 am and checked my cervix. I still am not dilated at all which is good - let the baby cook in there a little longer - but she did decide to put me on 1/2 days the rest of the time.
I would love to work those 4 hrs in the afternoon and sleep in each day but since I still have to get the boys off to school, I can't really sleep in so I plan on taking them to school at 7:30 am and going to work from there. I guess my hours then would be something like 8:00 ish to noonish.
The good news is I found out that my secondary disability insurance that I took out a year before we even got pregnant because I knew there was a possibility I'd be off work, will not only pick up the difference in my pay for me working 1/2 time but they'll pay the full benefit of my policy which is $600 a month. WHAT A HUGE RELIEF!! I only have a little 40 hrs of vacation time and if AFLAC didn't kick in, I'd have to supplement this time off with vacation and even at that I would have to take some of it unpaid and we just can't afford that. So, now I will get full pay while working 1/2 days and not have to touch my vacation time. Well, except the 1st week waiting period but some of that falls over my paid holidays for Thanksgiving so I still won't have to use much.
I was supposed to go in for a check today anyway but since I saw my dr last night she told me to call in and reschedule that for Monday or Tuesday. I go then on Tuesday at 1:00 pm. I had asked her about traveling to Ken's aunt & uncle's for Thanksgiving and she said let's wait 'til that appt to decide. I think if as long I don't have any contractions between now and then she will be ok with it and she wants me to be able to lay down in the car. His aunt & uncle live in Elkader which Ken says is about an hour and a half away. I really hope I get to go. I have been looking forward to Thanksgiving dinner for WEEKS. If I can't go to Elkader I am having Thanksgiving someone here in town then because I am soooooooo hungry for it. Any offers? Just kidding.
So, once again, I'll keep you all posted.
Thursday, November 04, 2004
another week closer...
Had latest ob check today - going every week now. I had totally forgotten to call in on Monday for the results of my Fetal Fibronectin test. When I realized that last night I figured it must have been negative or else I would have heard and I was right. Each test gives a 2 week window so that means I shouldn't go into labor unforeseen in the next two weeks. It sounded then like she would do the test every two weeks 'til I'm much closer.
Much closer? I figured it out earlier this week if I go the full time and have the scheduled c-section around Dec. 17th like I want, that was about 45 days from that moment. 45 DAYS!!! Are you kidding me? That's nothing! Look how fast a month goes by anymore! Sometimes it still seems like we were just finding out we were pregnant but that was WAY back in April. We'd better get crackin' on the babies room. We did get the computer and desk moved down to the basement yesterday. WE - like I did any of it - HA. That was really the major thing though. Now just a bunch of boxes, another desk, a small dresser, end table, tv stand & tv. Put up the crib, changing table and dresser, buy a mattress for crib. AHHHHH! Well, maybe it will be like with Brendon. The day after we finished the nursery, I went into labor and he was born before midnight that night.
I'm doing fine. No more contractions. In fact because of that she decided not to check my cervix today. She said she wasn't going to disturb anything. I'm still only at 8 lbs gained for the entire pregnancy. She expressed some concern over that but I don't know what to tell her. I am eating!!!
The heart rate today was 148. A little up there again from the majority of the times. We were joking at work about it being twins and the low heartbeat we heard so many times was a boy baby and the higher heart beat we heard in the beginning and now is a girl baby. Just joking though - I would think it would be highly unlikely given the fact that I've had 5 ultrasounds. You'd think they would have seen (2) babies on one of them - especially the transvaginal ones. It was a funny thought though.
Well, I'll continue to keep you all posted.
Much closer? I figured it out earlier this week if I go the full time and have the scheduled c-section around Dec. 17th like I want, that was about 45 days from that moment. 45 DAYS!!! Are you kidding me? That's nothing! Look how fast a month goes by anymore! Sometimes it still seems like we were just finding out we were pregnant but that was WAY back in April. We'd better get crackin' on the babies room. We did get the computer and desk moved down to the basement yesterday. WE - like I did any of it - HA. That was really the major thing though. Now just a bunch of boxes, another desk, a small dresser, end table, tv stand & tv. Put up the crib, changing table and dresser, buy a mattress for crib. AHHHHH! Well, maybe it will be like with Brendon. The day after we finished the nursery, I went into labor and he was born before midnight that night.
I'm doing fine. No more contractions. In fact because of that she decided not to check my cervix today. She said she wasn't going to disturb anything. I'm still only at 8 lbs gained for the entire pregnancy. She expressed some concern over that but I don't know what to tell her. I am eating!!!
The heart rate today was 148. A little up there again from the majority of the times. We were joking at work about it being twins and the low heartbeat we heard so many times was a boy baby and the higher heart beat we heard in the beginning and now is a girl baby. Just joking though - I would think it would be highly unlikely given the fact that I've had 5 ultrasounds. You'd think they would have seen (2) babies on one of them - especially the transvaginal ones. It was a funny thought though.
Well, I'll continue to keep you all posted.
Saturday, October 30, 2004
man, it's been awhile...
I haven't updated forever...too much going on I guess.
Well, let's go back...
Starting with 10/16/04:
This was the day of my PartyLite party. By time I gathered everything up at my mom's, hauled it back in the house and then jumped in cleaning my own house (since everyone else was camped out on the couches either playing video games or talking on the phone) oh I'd say by 5:00 pm I knew something was starting with the baby. I took it easy the rest of the day but from 9:00 - 9:30 pm I was having contractions every 2 minutes. Those subsided but I was still feeling pressure. Still not sure if it was serious enough to go to the hospital but knowing that my ob was upset with me that I hadn't gone in other times, I waited 'til 10:30 - 11:00 pm before I went.
They hooked me up to the monitor and not long after that I started having cramps/contractions - whatever they were. They said nothing was showing up on the monitors but they still gave me a shot to stop the contractions. Why they'd would do that if nothing was showing up I don't know but I suppose it was based on what I was telling them I was experiencing. They sent me home just over 2 hours after I had gotten there.
I rested the rest of the weekend and didn't have any more contractions for days.
So then on 10/21/04:
I had my regularly scheduled ob appt. I told her about my trip to L&D. She talked about repeating the Fetal Fibronectin test but it was too soon. It was to be at least 2 weeks. We talked about the connection of these bouts coming on on the weekends when I've been on my feet more and doing more than I do during the week so she said to stay off my feet as much as possible.
She said every week now that I make it she is just happy as can be with because we just didn't know what would happen with my cervix. It's still closed. She also said that if I go into labor anytime after 34 weeks (2 1/2 weeks from now) they'll just let me go. That's mid-November so I'm kind of resigning myself that we may very likely have a November baby. And actually as long as it's healthy, I'd be TOTALLY ok with that.
So, then I was going good until 10/27/04:
I didn't get a lot of sleep the night before. I swear there was an alien space ship hovering over our house the entire night. There was this loud buzzing noise over our house and eventually it started pounding inside my head. I was awake from that before the alarm went off but was just laying there not wanting to get up either. All of all sudden I felt like I was going to throw up. I turned on my side and soon started having cramps. After a little while I went ahead and got up and the rest of the morning I just didn't feel right. When I would walk my stomach felt different, later it was hard as a rock. Around 9:00 am I started having the pressure and pinching. Right then I told Leslie and Carla (the girl who is filling in for me) that I would probably be going home. I stuck around long enough to get Carla to a point where she'd have something work on the rest of the day. My plan then was to go home and go through the routine for pre-term labor...which is empty your bladder, drink 4 glasses of water and lay on your left side for an hour. If you have 4 or more contractions in an hour - head to the hospital. First Ken & I grabbed a bite to eat then I laid down. Within 10 minutes of my head hitting the pillow I was OUT.
An hour later I woke up though again having the pressure and pinching/cramping. I started my water again and waited. It was like that for about an hour and a half but not real intense or painful so again I didn't go to the hospital. The rest of the night I stayed off my feet and felt better just slow moving.
The next day I felt fine and happen to have an ob appt already scheduled that day - 10/28/04:
I told her how I had felt the day before and she re-did the Fetal Fibronectin test. I won't get the results 'til Monday. She checked my cervix, said it feels the same and that the baby still feels high (hasn't dropped).
So, the advice was basically the same. Stay off my feet as much as possible and go to the hospital if anything happens. I haven't had anything since.
Last night was funny though. When the winds picked up so much around 8:30 or so, he (or she) was moving like crazy. Have you ever heard that women can go into labor when there is a storm - it's the change in the barametric or air pressure?! That was really the first time I was seeing my stomach move around like there was an alien in there. No one else was home so it was just me laying there watching it all.
Hey, did anyone notice that I said he (or she) just then? I've been having thougths sometimes that when we go in for the c-section the baby actually comes out a girl. Maybe I'm just holding on to that a little. BUT a couple weeks ago Ken called out the word "GIRL" in his sleep. It was almost an exclamation, like "GIRL??". HAHA. Also the baby's heartbeat was back up to 152 at my appt Thursday. The last 4 or 5 appts it's been 140 every time. Plus I've got other girl "signs"...carrying high and all in front. I KNOW, I KNOW those are just old wives tales and I know of people who had those signs a certain way and it turned out to be the other but it's fun to toss the ideas around.
So it's day by day. Like I said, I've sort of resigned myself to a November baby so we'll see.
Well, let's go back...
Starting with 10/16/04:
This was the day of my PartyLite party. By time I gathered everything up at my mom's, hauled it back in the house and then jumped in cleaning my own house (since everyone else was camped out on the couches either playing video games or talking on the phone) oh I'd say by 5:00 pm I knew something was starting with the baby. I took it easy the rest of the day but from 9:00 - 9:30 pm I was having contractions every 2 minutes. Those subsided but I was still feeling pressure. Still not sure if it was serious enough to go to the hospital but knowing that my ob was upset with me that I hadn't gone in other times, I waited 'til 10:30 - 11:00 pm before I went.
They hooked me up to the monitor and not long after that I started having cramps/contractions - whatever they were. They said nothing was showing up on the monitors but they still gave me a shot to stop the contractions. Why they'd would do that if nothing was showing up I don't know but I suppose it was based on what I was telling them I was experiencing. They sent me home just over 2 hours after I had gotten there.
I rested the rest of the weekend and didn't have any more contractions for days.
So then on 10/21/04:
I had my regularly scheduled ob appt. I told her about my trip to L&D. She talked about repeating the Fetal Fibronectin test but it was too soon. It was to be at least 2 weeks. We talked about the connection of these bouts coming on on the weekends when I've been on my feet more and doing more than I do during the week so she said to stay off my feet as much as possible.
She said every week now that I make it she is just happy as can be with because we just didn't know what would happen with my cervix. It's still closed. She also said that if I go into labor anytime after 34 weeks (2 1/2 weeks from now) they'll just let me go. That's mid-November so I'm kind of resigning myself that we may very likely have a November baby. And actually as long as it's healthy, I'd be TOTALLY ok with that.
So, then I was going good until 10/27/04:
I didn't get a lot of sleep the night before. I swear there was an alien space ship hovering over our house the entire night. There was this loud buzzing noise over our house and eventually it started pounding inside my head. I was awake from that before the alarm went off but was just laying there not wanting to get up either. All of all sudden I felt like I was going to throw up. I turned on my side and soon started having cramps. After a little while I went ahead and got up and the rest of the morning I just didn't feel right. When I would walk my stomach felt different, later it was hard as a rock. Around 9:00 am I started having the pressure and pinching. Right then I told Leslie and Carla (the girl who is filling in for me) that I would probably be going home. I stuck around long enough to get Carla to a point where she'd have something work on the rest of the day. My plan then was to go home and go through the routine for pre-term labor...which is empty your bladder, drink 4 glasses of water and lay on your left side for an hour. If you have 4 or more contractions in an hour - head to the hospital. First Ken & I grabbed a bite to eat then I laid down. Within 10 minutes of my head hitting the pillow I was OUT.
An hour later I woke up though again having the pressure and pinching/cramping. I started my water again and waited. It was like that for about an hour and a half but not real intense or painful so again I didn't go to the hospital. The rest of the night I stayed off my feet and felt better just slow moving.
The next day I felt fine and happen to have an ob appt already scheduled that day - 10/28/04:
I told her how I had felt the day before and she re-did the Fetal Fibronectin test. I won't get the results 'til Monday. She checked my cervix, said it feels the same and that the baby still feels high (hasn't dropped).
So, the advice was basically the same. Stay off my feet as much as possible and go to the hospital if anything happens. I haven't had anything since.
Last night was funny though. When the winds picked up so much around 8:30 or so, he (or she) was moving like crazy. Have you ever heard that women can go into labor when there is a storm - it's the change in the barametric or air pressure?! That was really the first time I was seeing my stomach move around like there was an alien in there. No one else was home so it was just me laying there watching it all.
Hey, did anyone notice that I said he (or she) just then? I've been having thougths sometimes that when we go in for the c-section the baby actually comes out a girl. Maybe I'm just holding on to that a little. BUT a couple weeks ago Ken called out the word "GIRL" in his sleep. It was almost an exclamation, like "GIRL??". HAHA. Also the baby's heartbeat was back up to 152 at my appt Thursday. The last 4 or 5 appts it's been 140 every time. Plus I've got other girl "signs"...carrying high and all in front. I KNOW, I KNOW those are just old wives tales and I know of people who had those signs a certain way and it turned out to be the other but it's fun to toss the ideas around.
So it's day by day. Like I said, I've sort of resigned myself to a November baby so we'll see.
Tuesday, October 12, 2004
more contractions...
Well, I went back to my ob for an unscheduled visit after having contractions every 3 minutes for a little over an hour through the night Sunday night - from about 12:10 am to 1:30 am. I had gone to bed around 10:00 pm and was awoken suddenly at 12:10 am with these pains. Anyway, I was already laying down but after going to the bathroom, I got a glass of water and laid back down to wait it out. It wasn't 'til I looked up pre-term labor online at work the next morning and saw that any contractions over 4 or 5 in an hour you should call your doctor or be seen. I was still just going to wait and see if contractions started back up on Monday before I did anything until I read that so I went ahead and called my ob. They had me come in.
She checked my cervix and said it still feels closed and tight. The also did this test called Fetal Fibronectin where they take a swab from inside and depending on the results it's an indicator of whether I am likely to deliver early. I found this online at http://www.adeza.com/html/ffn_faq.htm. Fetal fibronectin is a protein that acts as a “glue” to hold the baby in place during the critical time of the baby’s development. Towards the end of pregnancy, fFN leaks (the “glue” begins to break down) into the vagina, which is a sign that delivery may be near. A negative fFN test result means that you are at lower risk of delivering prematurely. So negative is the desired result. Now my doctor said that a positive result wouldn't really tell them anything one way or another but this website says a positive fFN test result means that you have an increased risk of delivering prematurely. And it goes on to say, how you are treated for a positive fFN test is dependent on a number of other factors that you may be experiencing in your pregnancy.
Yesterday she sent me home for the rest of the day to rest. I still felt pressure and pinching throughout the day but nothing anymore intense or consistent. I sleep fine and so far today feel ok. I haven't been up walking around much but I think I am starting to feel some twenges of pressure. It's totally a wait and see thing. I am now suppose to go to the hospital if I have more than 4 contractions in an hour. If my doctor had told me that last week when we decided I was starting to have contractions, I probably would have gone in Sunday night. Otherwise, my thoughts were if it got to be a couple hours or I couldn't go back to sleep then I would go in. Since they subsided and I was able to sleep the rest of the night I thought I was ok. She talked about cutting me back to 1/2 days if necessary but nothing else will be decided either until I have another round of contractions or depending on the test results. She had told me to call back in yesterday afternoon for the results but when I called at the end of the day they didn't have them yet. I'll have to call again this morning.
I've been joking all along about having a Thanksgiving baby instead of a Christmas baby but I never thought Halloween would play into it. HA. But no, that's not going to happen, we are going to keep this baby in as long as possible. My mom asked me last night if I was far enough along for the baby to survive if it were born now or soon. I told her survive, yes, but it would probably be in the hospital for a while. The main thing with preemies is that their lungs aren't fully developed. I would think if the contractions continue or I end up on bedrest they may start the steriod injections that are available to help develop the baby's lungs. Otherwise, the estimates or averages of the baby's size at 28 weeks (which I will be 29 weeks tomorrow) is 14 inches from head to toe and roughly 3 lbs. Our last ultrasound estimated the baby at 1 lb, 12 oz but that was a month ago so 3 lbs or more even seems right.
I'll be updating here as we go.
She checked my cervix and said it still feels closed and tight. The also did this test called Fetal Fibronectin where they take a swab from inside and depending on the results it's an indicator of whether I am likely to deliver early. I found this online at http://www.adeza.com/html/ffn_faq.htm. Fetal fibronectin is a protein that acts as a “glue” to hold the baby in place during the critical time of the baby’s development. Towards the end of pregnancy, fFN leaks (the “glue” begins to break down) into the vagina, which is a sign that delivery may be near. A negative fFN test result means that you are at lower risk of delivering prematurely. So negative is the desired result. Now my doctor said that a positive result wouldn't really tell them anything one way or another but this website says a positive fFN test result means that you have an increased risk of delivering prematurely. And it goes on to say, how you are treated for a positive fFN test is dependent on a number of other factors that you may be experiencing in your pregnancy.
Yesterday she sent me home for the rest of the day to rest. I still felt pressure and pinching throughout the day but nothing anymore intense or consistent. I sleep fine and so far today feel ok. I haven't been up walking around much but I think I am starting to feel some twenges of pressure. It's totally a wait and see thing. I am now suppose to go to the hospital if I have more than 4 contractions in an hour. If my doctor had told me that last week when we decided I was starting to have contractions, I probably would have gone in Sunday night. Otherwise, my thoughts were if it got to be a couple hours or I couldn't go back to sleep then I would go in. Since they subsided and I was able to sleep the rest of the night I thought I was ok. She talked about cutting me back to 1/2 days if necessary but nothing else will be decided either until I have another round of contractions or depending on the test results. She had told me to call back in yesterday afternoon for the results but when I called at the end of the day they didn't have them yet. I'll have to call again this morning.
I've been joking all along about having a Thanksgiving baby instead of a Christmas baby but I never thought Halloween would play into it. HA. But no, that's not going to happen, we are going to keep this baby in as long as possible. My mom asked me last night if I was far enough along for the baby to survive if it were born now or soon. I told her survive, yes, but it would probably be in the hospital for a while. The main thing with preemies is that their lungs aren't fully developed. I would think if the contractions continue or I end up on bedrest they may start the steriod injections that are available to help develop the baby's lungs. Otherwise, the estimates or averages of the baby's size at 28 weeks (which I will be 29 weeks tomorrow) is 14 inches from head to toe and roughly 3 lbs. Our last ultrasound estimated the baby at 1 lb, 12 oz but that was a month ago so 3 lbs or more even seems right.
I'll be updating here as we go.
Thursday, October 07, 2004
latest check-up...
Had another ob check yesterday - like I said, I go every 2 weeks now. Everything is still fine (well sort of - you'll see why when you keep reading). Gained 4 1/2 lbs in the last 2 weeks. WHOA!! I'm not going to let that bother me. I made it to 26 weeks only gaining 5 lbs and I'm only at 9 1/2 overall. The average at this point is 17 - 24 lbs so I'm still hanging in there below average. While the baby has always measured a little above average. It's all baby. In fact she said she always has me measuring bigger than I should be but my ultrasound dates are right on.
I am starting to have contractions though. Those are her words too - she didn't say Braxton Hicks - she said it sounded like I was starting to have contractions. I had told her about these pains I had low in my pelvis for about 2 hours Friday night. They beared down like a cramp but at the height of it there would be a sharp pain or pinch. Pretty much what I had when I went into premature labor with Brendon. I told her that I laid down, went to bed and if I hadn't been able to sleep through the night or woke up with them Saturday morning then I was going to the hospital. She said that is exactly what I should do. (DUH?!) I had those pains again for about 10 minutes on Tuesday night too.
The weird thing is that after telling her that she didn't check my cervix. I would think if you have a patient who is at risk of premature delivery due to incompetent cervix and they tell you they are starting to have contractions - wouldn't you think you should check to see if they dilated at all from those contractions. I don't know - call me crazy but it seems to me that would be a given. I don't know why she didn't check my cervix either way. I'm pretty sure she has on every visit 'cept when I've had an ultrasound that visit also because they measure it on ultrasound so no need to physically check.
I had my gestational diabetes test on this visit. I'm soooo glad they have that orange flavor drink now. I remember with the boys the brown, cola like stuff. I didn't really have a problem getting it down taste wise. It was the drinking it in 5 minutes that was kinda hard. She said if I didn't hear from he by 5:00 pm then everything was fine with my test and I didn't hear anything. They also tested my iron and that was good at 12.2 - 12 is average.
So, other than we are hitting these heavier more uncomfortable months (I mean do I ever have a waddle when I walk) - we are still hanging in there. I don't know if we'll have any more ultrasounds before that next Level 2 ultrasound on 12/08. If these contractions keep up, we might not even make it to that one. I've said all along, this baby could have a mind of it's own and we end up with a Thanksgiving baby instead of a Christmas baby. We'll see. As long as he is healthy!!!
I am starting to have contractions though. Those are her words too - she didn't say Braxton Hicks - she said it sounded like I was starting to have contractions. I had told her about these pains I had low in my pelvis for about 2 hours Friday night. They beared down like a cramp but at the height of it there would be a sharp pain or pinch. Pretty much what I had when I went into premature labor with Brendon. I told her that I laid down, went to bed and if I hadn't been able to sleep through the night or woke up with them Saturday morning then I was going to the hospital. She said that is exactly what I should do. (DUH?!) I had those pains again for about 10 minutes on Tuesday night too.
The weird thing is that after telling her that she didn't check my cervix. I would think if you have a patient who is at risk of premature delivery due to incompetent cervix and they tell you they are starting to have contractions - wouldn't you think you should check to see if they dilated at all from those contractions. I don't know - call me crazy but it seems to me that would be a given. I don't know why she didn't check my cervix either way. I'm pretty sure she has on every visit 'cept when I've had an ultrasound that visit also because they measure it on ultrasound so no need to physically check.
I had my gestational diabetes test on this visit. I'm soooo glad they have that orange flavor drink now. I remember with the boys the brown, cola like stuff. I didn't really have a problem getting it down taste wise. It was the drinking it in 5 minutes that was kinda hard. She said if I didn't hear from he by 5:00 pm then everything was fine with my test and I didn't hear anything. They also tested my iron and that was good at 12.2 - 12 is average.
So, other than we are hitting these heavier more uncomfortable months (I mean do I ever have a waddle when I walk) - we are still hanging in there. I don't know if we'll have any more ultrasounds before that next Level 2 ultrasound on 12/08. If these contractions keep up, we might not even make it to that one. I've said all along, this baby could have a mind of it's own and we end up with a Thanksgiving baby instead of a Christmas baby. We'll see. As long as he is healthy!!!
Tuesday, September 21, 2004
boys aren't so bad...
My boys proved to me tonight how sweet they can be. It's not really THAT rare of an occassion but this was especially sweet.
They like to walk over to Hy-Vee or Drug Town (we live just a couple blocks) and buy candy or useless crap they can pile in their disaster of a room - oops off track. Anyway, they walked over there tonight because a friend was going and the last $16 of Brendon's birthday loot was burning a whole in his pocket. It was getting late ('bout 7:15 pm) so I told them to hurry because I didn't want them walking that far after dark. At 7:30 pm it already looked dark so I was going to jump in the truck and head that way and pick them up. When I stepped outside, I realized it wasn't quite as dark as I thought and I'd give them a few more minutes. Within the amount of time it took me to go to the bathroom, they come strolling in. They yelled to me they have a surprise. I could see Brendon holding a rectangular box behind his back. It looked like a large board game or something. Well, when they showed it to me it was a Baby's Activity Rattle Play-Gym. Brendon had spent $5 (obviously a markdown) of his birthday money on his baby brother. Actually both brothers because he also bought Dallas a stuffed animal (he is obsessed with them).
I thought that was really sweet!!!! They'll be good with the baby.
Oh that reminds me - we were talking about buying a house with 4 or 5 bedrooms and Dallas made a comment about how that would be good for us because we are getting a baby. "Getting a baby" - like we will just go to the store and pick one out. HA.
They like to walk over to Hy-Vee or Drug Town (we live just a couple blocks) and buy candy or useless crap they can pile in their disaster of a room - oops off track. Anyway, they walked over there tonight because a friend was going and the last $16 of Brendon's birthday loot was burning a whole in his pocket. It was getting late ('bout 7:15 pm) so I told them to hurry because I didn't want them walking that far after dark. At 7:30 pm it already looked dark so I was going to jump in the truck and head that way and pick them up. When I stepped outside, I realized it wasn't quite as dark as I thought and I'd give them a few more minutes. Within the amount of time it took me to go to the bathroom, they come strolling in. They yelled to me they have a surprise. I could see Brendon holding a rectangular box behind his back. It looked like a large board game or something. Well, when they showed it to me it was a Baby's Activity Rattle Play-Gym. Brendon had spent $5 (obviously a markdown) of his birthday money on his baby brother. Actually both brothers because he also bought Dallas a stuffed animal (he is obsessed with them).
I thought that was really sweet!!!! They'll be good with the baby.
Oh that reminds me - we were talking about buying a house with 4 or 5 bedrooms and Dallas made a comment about how that would be good for us because we are getting a baby. "Getting a baby" - like we will just go to the store and pick one out. HA.
E M B A R R A S S
Have you ever noticed that if you break down the word embarrass you actually get a root word of " bare ass"?! Boy did that ever fit for me last week...
oh yeah - this may be TMI (too much information) for some - not for the squeamish...
a first for me this pregnancy (never had it with the boys)...hemorrhoids! Oh and not your run of the mill hemorrhoid either - mine had a blood clot in it! So, after one trip to the doctor on Thursday and being in too much pain to wait the weeks it would take for the blood to reabsorb into my body, I ended up back at the doctor Friday to have the blood clot removed. Not the entire hemorrhoid mind you - no, that would be too merciful - just the blood clot.
But it was up on that table, on my side, naked from the waist down, with my doctor and his nurse stragetically positioned behind me that I really thought about the word embarrass (or bare ass) - for obvious reasons. And if that weren't bad enough - they have a new nurse who had never seen the procedure done before so they wanted to know if I minded if she watched. Heck, at that point how could I be more embarrassed?! Did you want to pose for a few pictures with the hemorrhoid too?
Hey, I got even though...that nurse didn't just watch - she got to hold my butt checks apart so the doctor could get in there! OH YEAH - I bet that made her day!!! Really though I handled the embarrassment in stride. I just kept thinking "God I hope I don't pass gas!". hehe
And it was about 12:30 pm so Ken and I were joking that we hoped they all had already eaten lunch. Otherwise, a cheeseburger covered in ketchup might night have been so appetizing after that procedure. HA.
On a lighter note, I am finally starting to feel better. The troops are retreating so to speak - I hope. At least I can sit without winching and wipe without crying. Ahhh the joys of pregnancy!
oh yeah - this may be TMI (too much information) for some - not for the squeamish...
a first for me this pregnancy (never had it with the boys)...hemorrhoids! Oh and not your run of the mill hemorrhoid either - mine had a blood clot in it! So, after one trip to the doctor on Thursday and being in too much pain to wait the weeks it would take for the blood to reabsorb into my body, I ended up back at the doctor Friday to have the blood clot removed. Not the entire hemorrhoid mind you - no, that would be too merciful - just the blood clot.
But it was up on that table, on my side, naked from the waist down, with my doctor and his nurse stragetically positioned behind me that I really thought about the word embarrass (or bare ass) - for obvious reasons. And if that weren't bad enough - they have a new nurse who had never seen the procedure done before so they wanted to know if I minded if she watched. Heck, at that point how could I be more embarrassed?! Did you want to pose for a few pictures with the hemorrhoid too?
Hey, I got even though...that nurse didn't just watch - she got to hold my butt checks apart so the doctor could get in there! OH YEAH - I bet that made her day!!! Really though I handled the embarrassment in stride. I just kept thinking "God I hope I don't pass gas!". hehe
And it was about 12:30 pm so Ken and I were joking that we hoped they all had already eaten lunch. Otherwise, a cheeseburger covered in ketchup might night have been so appetizing after that procedure. HA.
On a lighter note, I am finally starting to feel better. The troops are retreating so to speak - I hope. At least I can sit without winching and wipe without crying. Ahhh the joys of pregnancy!
at what point do you leave?
I had an ob check yesterday - the appt was at 10:45 am and I got there at 10:44 am (not late). I waited about 45 minutes in the lobby before they took me back. That wasn't so bad but then I waited another HOUR in the little room before the doctor came in. I was NOT happy. I kept thinking "ok at an hour and a half I walking out". 5 minutes before that deadline I heard someone enter a room near me so I thought ok I'll wait and see if I'm next. 20 minutes later I was still sitting there. I know - I chicken out. I kept wondering what I would do if they walked in while I was dressing to leave. And then I also figured it would still come back on me. They'd say I left without being seen and still charge my insurance which would be crap because I was there - THEY were the ones not seeing me. Would you have left?
So, we were already on a bad note when the doctor asked me about my Level 2 ultrasound. I guess it was too soon for her to have gotten a report back from Iowa City. Anyway, I told her they didn't see anything. PAUSE...she wasn't really responding and I have a tendency that if there is a lull in the conversation I don't think the person understood what I was trying to say so I keep talking and talking. I said, "she said if you used your imagination maybe you could see something but she didn't think it was anything". Still PAUSE....ok maybe I got a "really?". But now I thought I had said something wrong so I tried to qualify it by saying, "well, they saw a bright spot on the right side but said it was muscle tissue and said maybe there was a brighter spot on the left but they didn't think that was anything". Then she lets loose with "WELL, we can CERTAINLY show them the pictures we saw because there definitely was a bright spot!!"
pissy, pissy, pissy
I thought later how that statement was news to me because on the phone she said she didn't see anything the day of the ultrasound at her office - and that it was another doctor who "thought" they saw a "small" echo. Now all of a sudden there "definitely" was something there. It's like she was pissed they are saying it was nothing. Wasn't that the goal?! Isn't "nothing" good news in this situation?!
Ok - this next part might be TMI (too much information) for some of you so be forewarned...
So then it was time for the pelvic check. I have one at every visit so she can check my cervix. And during each of those lovely exams I can alway feel her knuckles burring into my butt as she gets in there far enough to feel the cervix. Having someones knuckles pushing into your butt doesn't feel good anyday but it especially KILLS when you have a external hemrrhoid the size of Texas. (Ok I realize that analogy would then make my butt the size of North America but go with me on this.) No, there's no being delicate - she pushed right on the puppy too.
I was in tears leaving there. My butt hurt, my feelings were hurt, my pride was hurt! I just wanted to go home and crawl back in bed. Since I had to go back to work I treated myself to lunch instead. Still felt crappy the rest of the day! What ever happened to bedside manner?
So, we were already on a bad note when the doctor asked me about my Level 2 ultrasound. I guess it was too soon for her to have gotten a report back from Iowa City. Anyway, I told her they didn't see anything. PAUSE...she wasn't really responding and I have a tendency that if there is a lull in the conversation I don't think the person understood what I was trying to say so I keep talking and talking. I said, "she said if you used your imagination maybe you could see something but she didn't think it was anything". Still PAUSE....ok maybe I got a "really?". But now I thought I had said something wrong so I tried to qualify it by saying, "well, they saw a bright spot on the right side but said it was muscle tissue and said maybe there was a brighter spot on the left but they didn't think that was anything". Then she lets loose with "WELL, we can CERTAINLY show them the pictures we saw because there definitely was a bright spot!!"
pissy, pissy, pissy
I thought later how that statement was news to me because on the phone she said she didn't see anything the day of the ultrasound at her office - and that it was another doctor who "thought" they saw a "small" echo. Now all of a sudden there "definitely" was something there. It's like she was pissed they are saying it was nothing. Wasn't that the goal?! Isn't "nothing" good news in this situation?!
Ok - this next part might be TMI (too much information) for some of you so be forewarned...
So then it was time for the pelvic check. I have one at every visit so she can check my cervix. And during each of those lovely exams I can alway feel her knuckles burring into my butt as she gets in there far enough to feel the cervix. Having someones knuckles pushing into your butt doesn't feel good anyday but it especially KILLS when you have a external hemrrhoid the size of Texas. (Ok I realize that analogy would then make my butt the size of North America but go with me on this.) No, there's no being delicate - she pushed right on the puppy too.
I was in tears leaving there. My butt hurt, my feelings were hurt, my pride was hurt! I just wanted to go home and crawl back in bed. Since I had to go back to work I treated myself to lunch instead. Still felt crappy the rest of the day! What ever happened to bedside manner?
Thursday, September 16, 2004
Some GREAT news and some so so news...
Well, we got mostly great news today. They didn't see anything on the ultrasound. "They" being a technician, (2) doctors and a med student - we had a room full. First the technician did the ultrasound and took a bunch of pictures. She told us when she was looking at the heart that she didn't see anything. The echo the doctor here thought they saw was supposedly in the left ventricle. The tech today said she saw a brighter spot (remember that is what those echos are classified as - "bright spots") in the right side of the heart but that was only muscle tissue. She said maybe there was a brighter spot on the left side but she wouldn't even consider that anything. Later she also said she wouldn't have sent us for that.
Anyway, she went and showed everything to a doctor and then the doctor came in to watch her do more of the ultrasound. Funny thing - in that timeframe the baby flipped and they no longer could get a good view of the heart. They referred back to the pictures she saved earlier while she kept trying to get the baby to move. They were finally able to get a couple more views of the heart. Again, they didn't find anything. The one doctor said maybe there was a brighter spot and if you used your imagination then maybe you could make something of it but she didn't see it as anything. The other doctor said they were beautiful pictures of the heart. I was trying to hold back tears and the med student said, "this is a good thing" so then I had to choke out the words "I know, these are happy tears!". They all smiled and chuckled.
Our theme seems to be settle or discount one issue but find another. Well, turns out that on 1 out of 3 pictures of the baby's kidneys today - they think the left kidney was slightly enlarged. Again, this was only on 1 out of 3 pictures. SO...we get to do this Level 2 ultrasound again at 36 weeks to double check the kidneys before the baby is born. Again, they are telling us this could be absolutely nothing. The said that they have a set size the kidneys should be at 18 weeks, but I'm passed that stage. They also have a set size for the kidneys at 28 weeks and I'm not there yet. So, they said it could very well be that everything is fine for my gestational stage but they just don't have those set numbers. When someone is that far along they offer to come to Cedar Rapids to do the ultrasound. I took them up on that since with my stitches I may not tracel well at 36 weeks. So, that will be Dec. 8th.
Otherwise, I have a regular ob check on Monday the 20th (Brendon's 11th b-day) and another on Oct. 1st so chugging along we go.
The baby measured at 1 lb 12 oz - slightly above the above of 1 lb 8 oz - and the heartbeat was 146. Yes, slowing down to that boy rate.
I can't tell you how relieved we were or thank you all enough for your kind words and wishes. I asked Ken if he had said his prayers this morning or if he had at all. He said yes and asked if I had - and I said yes. I know you all did too.
I saw our family doctor later in the day and I hadn't been in since I've been pregnant so when they asked how everything was going I told them we've hit some bumps along the way but we are getting through fine. Now we pray it stays that way.
Thanks everyone.
OH YEAH...I forgot....
the technician was typing some stuff into the computer before she went to get the doctor. The first words I saw were "no abnormalities noted" and that was great! But then right befor she shut if off I saw this, "view limited due to patient's size". WHAT THE ...?!! I totally don't even know what that means!!! I guess it means since I'm overweight (aka FAT) they couldn't see as well. That totally sucks that they would even say that. I have to say I was kind of offended.
Anyway, she went and showed everything to a doctor and then the doctor came in to watch her do more of the ultrasound. Funny thing - in that timeframe the baby flipped and they no longer could get a good view of the heart. They referred back to the pictures she saved earlier while she kept trying to get the baby to move. They were finally able to get a couple more views of the heart. Again, they didn't find anything. The one doctor said maybe there was a brighter spot and if you used your imagination then maybe you could make something of it but she didn't see it as anything. The other doctor said they were beautiful pictures of the heart. I was trying to hold back tears and the med student said, "this is a good thing" so then I had to choke out the words "I know, these are happy tears!". They all smiled and chuckled.
Our theme seems to be settle or discount one issue but find another. Well, turns out that on 1 out of 3 pictures of the baby's kidneys today - they think the left kidney was slightly enlarged. Again, this was only on 1 out of 3 pictures. SO...we get to do this Level 2 ultrasound again at 36 weeks to double check the kidneys before the baby is born. Again, they are telling us this could be absolutely nothing. The said that they have a set size the kidneys should be at 18 weeks, but I'm passed that stage. They also have a set size for the kidneys at 28 weeks and I'm not there yet. So, they said it could very well be that everything is fine for my gestational stage but they just don't have those set numbers. When someone is that far along they offer to come to Cedar Rapids to do the ultrasound. I took them up on that since with my stitches I may not tracel well at 36 weeks. So, that will be Dec. 8th.
Otherwise, I have a regular ob check on Monday the 20th (Brendon's 11th b-day) and another on Oct. 1st so chugging along we go.
The baby measured at 1 lb 12 oz - slightly above the above of 1 lb 8 oz - and the heartbeat was 146. Yes, slowing down to that boy rate.
I can't tell you how relieved we were or thank you all enough for your kind words and wishes. I asked Ken if he had said his prayers this morning or if he had at all. He said yes and asked if I had - and I said yes. I know you all did too.
I saw our family doctor later in the day and I hadn't been in since I've been pregnant so when they asked how everything was going I told them we've hit some bumps along the way but we are getting through fine. Now we pray it stays that way.
Thanks everyone.
OH YEAH...I forgot....
the technician was typing some stuff into the computer before she went to get the doctor. The first words I saw were "no abnormalities noted" and that was great! But then right befor she shut if off I saw this, "view limited due to patient's size". WHAT THE ...?!! I totally don't even know what that means!!! I guess it means since I'm overweight (aka FAT) they couldn't see as well. That totally sucks that they would even say that. I have to say I was kind of offended.
Friday, September 10, 2004
info on the "echo" my doctor referred too...
I tried to do some research yesterday as soon as I had a chance on this "echo" my ob referred to on the ultrasound. The only thing I could really find was about echocardiograms which basically is the ultrasound of the heart. Well, someone from the Incompetent Cervix support group I recently joined (online) turned me on to the actual name they are probably referring too. It's called an echogenic focus - a bright spot (or echo) in the heart on the ultrasound.
Here is a great site that explains it in easy terms and has a good ultrasound image showing the "echo".
http://www.medfriendly.com/echogeniccardiacfoci.html#whatisit
I got a lot of relief from this because it's very common for these echoes to show up on 2nd trimester ultrasounds but it also talked a lot about the possibility of Down Syndrome. I admit, I broke down for a few minutes. It's just so heartbreaking to think of the possibilities. I was trying so hard to convince myself that even if it was a chromosome defect that it didn't necessarily mean any form of retardation. I just don't know that much about it and I was hoping against hope that chromosome damage doesn't always mean retardation. And I don't think that it does but all the reading I've done on this particular condition, they only talked about Down Syndrome.
I truly do not intend to and hope I don't offend anyone who does know of or live with that kind of handicap when I express my fears. Ken and I both have Celerbal Palsy in our families. I've never told my sister-in-law this but I admire her for all she's done for my niece. I admire her strength. It's like I said before that you just never know how or if you can handle these types of things until or if they happen to you. I know I will find the strength yet I feel guilty for hoping that I don't have too.
Anyway, I also found some posts on another message board where people had an echo show on their ultrasounds too and everything turned out fine. They are very informative so I'm including a couple below. I already knew before this that a lot of these genetic or abnormality tests are very unreliable and inconclusive. That is part of the reason we turned them down. I turned down the amnio because of the significant risk of miscarriage and also turned down the Alpha Feta Protein blood test because of the high number of false positives. I also didn't want to have to go through the rest of my pregnancy stressing out about something I couldn't change. Yet here I am doing that same thing.
Still trying to stay positive and keep my mind off of it 'til the test.
Here are those stories of other people's cases...(these were not posted to me, they were posted to someone else at some point who went through the same thing).
"...just went through your very same experience. I was told at 21 weeks that my baby had an Echogenic Focus of the Left Ventricle. My OB was not concerned and said it is a very common finding and sent me to a Perinatologist to do a level 2 U/S. The Peri saw absolutely nothing and told me that the original U/S could have just been on a weird setting that day. The Peri and the OB both told me that this does not indicate D/S and with it being the only thing that was possibly seen on the 1st. U/S they didn't even feel the need for an amnio, which my husband and I would have rejected anyway because we would never terminate the pregnancy regardless of the outcome and the risk of miscarriage and infection are pretty high with amnio. I am 31 years old and this is my 3rd. baby. I am confident that your baby will be fine if this was the only thing they saw. I cried for three weeks waiting for my appt. with the Peri, please try to relax and take care of your pregnancy. I know first hand how scary it is to be told that there may be something wrong, but know that God is in control. My Peri told me that the U/S tech. should never say what the possibilities are especially when this is the only marker. I will be praying for you, your baby and your husband. Hang in there, you will end up very happy in a few months. ...".
"...know what your going through. At 19 weeks they also saw an echogenic focus on my baby's heart. My triple screen came back normal too and my doctor did not advise an amnio (I am 28 yrs. old) She told me her group sees this with some degree of frequency in their patients. She currently had 5 other women with this besides me. At my 28 week ultrasound they could not find the EIF. I visit this site often because it is positive and I have not read one story about EIF being the only marker and a baby having a chromosomal defect. If your doctor feels good about things that's a good sign. Read the old posts on here too and you will feel better. Good luck. ...".
"...My baby had an ECF in her left ventricle at my 18 week ultrasound. I was 34 at the time and no other markers were present. I didn't have an AFP or an amnio but did worry for the rest of my pregnancy. I had genetic counseling and there was a lot of doom and gloom about Down Syndrome presented to me and my husband which was so unnecessary. It caused us so much anguish.
My daughter is 11 months now and perfectly healthy. I am now pregnant with my third child and if my ultrasound shows up an ECF, I definitely won't worry this time. ...".
I'm adding this on 09/13/04 after a response on the message boards over the weekend...
"...I have a very good friend who also as told at her 20 week sono that the baby had this spot on his heart. They told her that sometimes this is seen in babies with downs, but not always. They did not find any other problems that would cause them to suspect a chromosome defect. (thick nuchal fold, SGA ect..) The spot on the heart continued to show up on all subsequent sono's. Her doc told her that from his experience, the spot ended up being nothing more times than it was a problem. She delivered a 8# 7oz healthy baby boy 2 days ago. He does not have any heart problems or anything. I will keep you in my prayers. ..."
Here is just another brief explanation and doctor's thoughts...
Intracardiac Echogenic Focus
Increased echogenicity (a bright echo) of the fetal cardiac papillary muscles or chordae tendineae (usually left-sided) is seen in 3 to 5% of fetuses scanned and is considered by most investigators to be a benign ultrasound finding. Reports of Bromley et al and others, however, have suggested that there is an association between this finding and trisomy 21 (Down Syndrome). This group found that 6% of fetuses with an echogenic intracardiac focus had trisomy 21. They estimated that in a low risk population with an age adjusted risk of Down syndrome of 1/250, the presence of an intracardiac echogenic focus would have a 1.5% predictive value for trisomy 21 (Down Syndrome). However, other investigators (including data from SJMMC) have not been able to find a statistically significant association between isolated echogenic foci in the fetal heart and chromosomal abnormalities. Further research in this area still needs to be done to clarify the significance of Intracardiac echogenic foci.
I'll definitetly keep you all posted.
Here is a great site that explains it in easy terms and has a good ultrasound image showing the "echo".
http://www.medfriendly.com/echogeniccardiacfoci.html#whatisit
I got a lot of relief from this because it's very common for these echoes to show up on 2nd trimester ultrasounds but it also talked a lot about the possibility of Down Syndrome. I admit, I broke down for a few minutes. It's just so heartbreaking to think of the possibilities. I was trying so hard to convince myself that even if it was a chromosome defect that it didn't necessarily mean any form of retardation. I just don't know that much about it and I was hoping against hope that chromosome damage doesn't always mean retardation. And I don't think that it does but all the reading I've done on this particular condition, they only talked about Down Syndrome.
I truly do not intend to and hope I don't offend anyone who does know of or live with that kind of handicap when I express my fears. Ken and I both have Celerbal Palsy in our families. I've never told my sister-in-law this but I admire her for all she's done for my niece. I admire her strength. It's like I said before that you just never know how or if you can handle these types of things until or if they happen to you. I know I will find the strength yet I feel guilty for hoping that I don't have too.
Anyway, I also found some posts on another message board where people had an echo show on their ultrasounds too and everything turned out fine. They are very informative so I'm including a couple below. I already knew before this that a lot of these genetic or abnormality tests are very unreliable and inconclusive. That is part of the reason we turned them down. I turned down the amnio because of the significant risk of miscarriage and also turned down the Alpha Feta Protein blood test because of the high number of false positives. I also didn't want to have to go through the rest of my pregnancy stressing out about something I couldn't change. Yet here I am doing that same thing.
Still trying to stay positive and keep my mind off of it 'til the test.
Here are those stories of other people's cases...(these were not posted to me, they were posted to someone else at some point who went through the same thing).
"...just went through your very same experience. I was told at 21 weeks that my baby had an Echogenic Focus of the Left Ventricle. My OB was not concerned and said it is a very common finding and sent me to a Perinatologist to do a level 2 U/S. The Peri saw absolutely nothing and told me that the original U/S could have just been on a weird setting that day. The Peri and the OB both told me that this does not indicate D/S and with it being the only thing that was possibly seen on the 1st. U/S they didn't even feel the need for an amnio, which my husband and I would have rejected anyway because we would never terminate the pregnancy regardless of the outcome and the risk of miscarriage and infection are pretty high with amnio. I am 31 years old and this is my 3rd. baby. I am confident that your baby will be fine if this was the only thing they saw. I cried for three weeks waiting for my appt. with the Peri, please try to relax and take care of your pregnancy. I know first hand how scary it is to be told that there may be something wrong, but know that God is in control. My Peri told me that the U/S tech. should never say what the possibilities are especially when this is the only marker. I will be praying for you, your baby and your husband. Hang in there, you will end up very happy in a few months. ...".
"...know what your going through. At 19 weeks they also saw an echogenic focus on my baby's heart. My triple screen came back normal too and my doctor did not advise an amnio (I am 28 yrs. old) She told me her group sees this with some degree of frequency in their patients. She currently had 5 other women with this besides me. At my 28 week ultrasound they could not find the EIF. I visit this site often because it is positive and I have not read one story about EIF being the only marker and a baby having a chromosomal defect. If your doctor feels good about things that's a good sign. Read the old posts on here too and you will feel better. Good luck. ...".
"...My baby had an ECF in her left ventricle at my 18 week ultrasound. I was 34 at the time and no other markers were present. I didn't have an AFP or an amnio but did worry for the rest of my pregnancy. I had genetic counseling and there was a lot of doom and gloom about Down Syndrome presented to me and my husband which was so unnecessary. It caused us so much anguish.
My daughter is 11 months now and perfectly healthy. I am now pregnant with my third child and if my ultrasound shows up an ECF, I definitely won't worry this time. ...".
I'm adding this on 09/13/04 after a response on the message boards over the weekend...
"...I have a very good friend who also as told at her 20 week sono that the baby had this spot on his heart. They told her that sometimes this is seen in babies with downs, but not always. They did not find any other problems that would cause them to suspect a chromosome defect. (thick nuchal fold, SGA ect..) The spot on the heart continued to show up on all subsequent sono's. Her doc told her that from his experience, the spot ended up being nothing more times than it was a problem. She delivered a 8# 7oz healthy baby boy 2 days ago. He does not have any heart problems or anything. I will keep you in my prayers. ..."
Here is just another brief explanation and doctor's thoughts...
Intracardiac Echogenic Focus
Increased echogenicity (a bright echo) of the fetal cardiac papillary muscles or chordae tendineae (usually left-sided) is seen in 3 to 5% of fetuses scanned and is considered by most investigators to be a benign ultrasound finding. Reports of Bromley et al and others, however, have suggested that there is an association between this finding and trisomy 21 (Down Syndrome). This group found that 6% of fetuses with an echogenic intracardiac focus had trisomy 21. They estimated that in a low risk population with an age adjusted risk of Down syndrome of 1/250, the presence of an intracardiac echogenic focus would have a 1.5% predictive value for trisomy 21 (Down Syndrome). However, other investigators (including data from SJMMC) have not been able to find a statistically significant association between isolated echogenic foci in the fetal heart and chromosomal abnormalities. Further research in this area still needs to be done to clarify the significance of Intracardiac echogenic foci.
I'll definitetly keep you all posted.
Thursday, September 09, 2004
possible heart defect...
We didn't get such great news today. If you read my last post, maybe you remember me saying that my ob said she would call me if anything changed on the official ultrasound report verses what she viewed in the office that day. Well, we got a call today that a radiologist thinks he sees a small echo (whatever that is) in the heart. They are sending us to University next Thursday (09/16/04) for a Level 2 ultrasound. This could be nothing - as in they may not even find an echo on the 2nd ultrasound. Or it could be a heart defect, an underlying heart disease, or a chromosome defect.
Needless to say I've been a wreck since I got the call. Then I missed the call back with our appt time so I was wondering why the heck they hadn't called me back yet. I finally checked my voice mail and they had actually called. I'm trying to stay positive but it's scary. We previously turned down all of the genetic testing they offered (based on my age) because we figured there wouldn't be anything they can do anyway. I guessing that if this new ultrasound shows a defect they will insist on an amniocentesis to rule out chromosome defects.
I remember we went through (3) different scares with Dallas - one before he was born and all of those came out fine. So, like I said, I am trying to stay positive and keep my mind off it but it's hard. It's not that I'm worried we'll lose the baby. I know they can do heart surgery and even can do that inutero. I'm worried if it's a chromosome thing then mental retardation always come to mind. Or with a heart defect, life long health problems. I just don't know if I'm strong enough to get through something like that. I guess you never do know until or unless it happens to you.
Keep us in your prayers this next week.
Needless to say I've been a wreck since I got the call. Then I missed the call back with our appt time so I was wondering why the heck they hadn't called me back yet. I finally checked my voice mail and they had actually called. I'm trying to stay positive but it's scary. We previously turned down all of the genetic testing they offered (based on my age) because we figured there wouldn't be anything they can do anyway. I guessing that if this new ultrasound shows a defect they will insist on an amniocentesis to rule out chromosome defects.
I remember we went through (3) different scares with Dallas - one before he was born and all of those came out fine. So, like I said, I am trying to stay positive and keep my mind off it but it's hard. It's not that I'm worried we'll lose the baby. I know they can do heart surgery and even can do that inutero. I'm worried if it's a chromosome thing then mental retardation always come to mind. Or with a heart defect, life long health problems. I just don't know if I'm strong enough to get through something like that. I guess you never do know until or unless it happens to you.
Keep us in your prayers this next week.
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