Hopefully he has learned his lesson...

Dallas is in the basement right now sicker than a dog and hopefully he has learned his lesson...

First of all, he has this friend who is very questionable as to whether Dallas should actually hang out with him. There have been times both his dad and I have said we aren't sure we want him hanging out with him. There also have been times when I do let him hang out with him, I've had to make them take a break from each other because I don't like the way Dallas starts to act around him.

Anyway, today is the only the 2nd time he has hung out with him since we moved back to our old neighborhood. They went to the mall like usual and on the walk home they stopped off at Walmart for a pop (or soda for those not from around here). Hours later, Dallas comes running in from being outside with said friend and our neighbor kid. I didn't hear him go back out but I also didn't hear them tooling around in the basement so I figured I missed him go back out. I was in the kitchen making something to eat and when I came out to the couch to sit down, Dallas was laying on the couch looking hurt.

I asked him what happened and he said nothing. I asked, "then what are you doing?" (couldn't figure it out because the friend was still outside), he said his stomach hurt. I asked him if someone had punched him or something and he said no. He said something about the chips they took outside being stale.

They very well could have been but Jace had eaten them earlier in the day and he wasn't sick. Stale chips taste bad and you may want to puke, but generally they don't actually make you sick.

After a little bit the friend came in to check on Dallas. I asked him what happened and he said he didn't know. Within a few mintues I heard him say "see ya" to Dallas and he left. I figured he had called for a ride thinking why spend the night if Dallas was sick. But my mother's intuition was setting in. Like I said, I know it was not the chips making him sick. I went down and demanded to know if he had smoked or drank anything when they were outside and he swore no.

Dallas will alway try to come up with what he thinks is a plausible scenario for what might have happened rather than take responsibility for what actually happened. But he doesn't realize who he is dealing with and that I spent 3 years hearing the biggest whoppers in the book from the person who wrote the book on lying to me, so I can smell a lie coming out of Dallas' mouth before he even thinks up the lie. Plus he has "tells"...you know...little give aways that you are lying. Supposedly every one has them. Dallas' tells are:

1) he first claims he has no idea. The "I don't know" defense that pierces the brain of every parent because you know that there is no way in H they cannot know.

2) go with the most outrageous plot to deflect even the slightest suspicion off yourself. I'll call this the "Subway was robbed" defense in memory of one of the biggest whoppers his dad ever told me to explain why he wasn't home when he probably should have been. The theory, I guess, being that if you are going to lie, lie big!

3) this isn't really a "tell" but rather a stage... confession...it's good for the soul you know. Ahh but Dallas will hold out his confession 'til the cows come home. We'll call this the "that's my story and I'm sticking to it" defense. He once stuck by his story so much that he was hiding under his bedding pouting, "no one ever believes me" and "why don't you ever think Brendon does anything" - blah blah blah. He had stuck to his story so long and put on such a show that he couldn't bring himself to actually say the words that he had done it so he had to put his confession in writing.

So, we already had tell # 1 in the "nothing happened" and the friend not knowing what happened and the denial that he had done this to himself. Then came tell #2. Again, I knew this was not just bad potato chips. As I pushed for the truth (and threatened to call his dad if I didn't get it), here it came...

Dallas: "the only thing I can think of is when I was slamming myself against a tree".

Me: "Why were you slamming yourself against a tree?"

Dallas: "I don't know (nice revisit to tell #1), but it was right after I ate the chips and I was already feeling full".

See what I mean about outrageous? Oh he is good. But I wasn't buying it for a second. That's the problem with outrageous... anyone with half a brain can figure it out. And I don't mean to brag but I'd like to think I've got at least 3/4 of a brain.

I left him to his pain. Pretty soon I heard him praying to the porcelein God in the basement bathroom - giving an "offering" so to speak. I kept letting him stew (no visual pun intended) and pretty soon we arrived at stage 3. Dallas called up asking me to come down there. When I did, this is what he said...

Dallas: "I don't think I should hang out with _ _ _ _ anymore."

Me: (knowing this was confession time but really leery of what I was going to hear given that intro) "why?".

Dallas: "well, we were feeling tired and wanted to stay up so we took these caffeine pills _ _ _ _ bought and then we both starting feeling sick so I don't think I'm going to hang out with him for awhile".

Hardy Har Har - silly boy actually thinks he has a choice in the matter. Like that already wasn't going to be a stipulation after what he just told me.

So, I tried to get the name of the pills so I could look them up on the internet and see what the side effects are and stuff. All he could remember was they were called "Jet ..." something and the box was blue and yellow. When they stopped at Walmart for that pop (soda), _ _ _ _ bought them then. During the inquisition he started crying so then I had to tell him to calm down. That getting upset what just going to make his stomach muscles cramp and make things worse. I asked if he was crying because he was in so much pain or because he was afraid he was in trouble. He winched "BOTH". I said, "well there will be a reprimand but the important thing right now is for you to feel better.". I told him to stretch out in bed, with a fluffy pillow and warm blanket and relax.

I couldn't find the specific pill online but a lot of them mentioned that each tablet is 200 mg and he said they had each taken (2). Then I remembered I've taked NoDoz before when working late nights and those are 200 mg each and the adult dose is one tablet in at least a 6 hr period I believe. They had taken twice that.

I went back down and told him I hadn't really found anything but he basically had too much caffeine. I also explained though that I did read that it can be extremely dangerous and asked him if he had learned his lesson about taking pills he doesn't know anything about. He says yes and I truly hope that is true. It could really have been worse. It could have been pills someone gave them rather than something bought over-the-counter. Not minimizing the seriousness at all.

Last I checked on him, his stomach was feeling better. We'll see how he feels tomorrow. Might feel like a hangover - who knows.

Starting to wonder how our parents survived us but makes me certain if they could, I can.