Our Day in Pictures (by Mommy & Jace))

Since there ended up being a little sun this afternoon...

...Jace and I decided to go outside and play...

...here Jace is playing some baseball...

...and here I am cheering him on while enjoying some of the green beer I missed out on yesterday...

...then we decided to follow a rainbow...

...but as can see we did not find a pot of gold...or anymore green beer!

...all and all...a pretty good afternoon!

May I See Your IUD Please?

I tell you nothing will strike fear in the heart of a girl still in her "prime", if you will, faster than the doctor saying during an exam that they think your IUD has become dislodged!!!

Uhhhh, say whaaatt??!!!

...and that they need to do an ultrasound to make sure it's still in place.

Wholly EPT Batman, that was a close one!

Not One of Those Days

A few weeks ago it occurred to me that the 6 month anniversary of my mom's death was fast approaching. That revelation shook me. I thought there is no way it's been that long. I re-did the math and simply couldn't believe that Feb. 13th was going to be 6 months. But then the day came and went and I never gave it a second thought. How could that be? When I realized I hadn't even thought of it that day, I was really upset with myself for not acknowledging it. But realistically, what was I supposed to do? Lock myself in my room, listen to her favorite songs and bawl my eyes out? Life goes on, right? Life goes on and that's what happens is some days you are so very aware of her being gone and you miss her so much it breaks your heart all over again and then some days it doesn't...some days it doesn't enter your mind...you still miss her...but more and more days pass and you aren't consumed with grief.

Today was not one of those days. Ken & I had a meeting with our divorce attorney and it's out on Mt. Vernon Rd. We drove passsed Mercy Hospital to get there and on the way out, it didn't really affect me too much. But on the drive back, like every time I drive by Mercy, I looked up at that 9th floor window and the tears came. I thought I could hold it in, dry my tears, let it go with each block we got further away but I couldn't. Looking up at that window takes me right back into that room watching her slip away...waiting for her to die...but also how peaceful she looked once she was gone. I tried so hard not to cry, not to break down, that I literally could not catch my breath - gasping more than once for air.

It was just one of those moments...one of those days that I'm very aware of her being gone. And the thing is those moments...those days are not always going to come on the anniversary of her death, on Mother's Day, on her birthday, or at the holidays. Some days will always be easier than others but today was not one of those days.

It is too late to put my kids up for adoption?

I'm starting to understand the Nebraska Safe Haven law that allows for kids up to age 17 to be dropped off with no retribution. Surely it was allowing for a conversation such as this that could cause a parent to bring harm to their child.

B: "I have a 1/2 day suspension on Monday."
Me: "Why?"
B: "Demerits."
Me: "Umm, the other day when you dad was mad about your getting 4 demerits in 2 days you acted like it was no big deal. Tardy a couple times to a class far away from your locker. How many demerits do you have?"
B: "11."
Me: "Umm, for what?"
B: "Being tardy and stuff."
Me: "What stuff?"
B: "Not having a pencil."
Me: "Why don't you have a pencil?"
B: "I lost it."
Me: "Why didn't you ask me for another one?"
B: (silence)
Me: "Umm, hello? That was a question - it needs a response."
Me: (not waiting for response) "Or take some loose change and buy one at the school store?"
B: "I don't have any loose change and I'd just loose it."
Me: "You are plain out saying you are too irresponsible to keep track of a pencil all day so why bother trying to have one with you?"
B: "I forget it."
Me: "Why do you forget it?"
B: "I use it and set it down and forget about it."
Me: "You mean the one main school supply you use in every class you can't remember to keep with you throughout the day?"
B: "I don't use it in every class."
Me: "So, if you have a pencil with you but happen to not need it for your next class, you just ditch it...leave it behind?"
B: (silence)
Me: ...bang my head against the car door...

Then I changed the subject...

Me: "I didn't realize, or had forgotten, that Kenyon played at Iowa when Chris Street played there." (Kenyon Murray, former Iowa great, was Brendon's basketball coach this year.)
B: (in the most snotty, you are the stupidest person to inhabit the earth, what are you even talking about voice) "WHO'S THAT?!"

I couldn't even look at him after that, let alone talk to him...good thing we just arrived at day care to pick up the good son. I never did answer his question, instead, for his hour of homework time tonight he has to research and write me one page on who Chris Street is. Yeah - he'll be Googling him.

So, hopefully I'll be back in time for Necole's party tomorrow after first driving to Omaha to show Brendon where he'll be staying now.

When How You Feel on the Inside is Not What You Look Like on the Outside

Ever go around with a certain air about you, a certain amount of confidence, way you carry yourself that comes from how you feel on the inside only to be dropped kicked with the reality of how you actually look to the outside world?

I've thought about it quite a bit. Someone once said to me (and I think it was about me) that confidence and how one carries themselves (despite weight) was sexy. In fact, another person said something very similar to me about a year ago. They were telling me that they've had a crush on me for years and even as my body has changed over the years it didn't change the way they thought of me and that it was my "bubbly personality" (har har) that is what attracts them to me.

It got me thinking that a lot of the time I do walk through my life...whether it's getting a soda at work...or singing along with the band out with friends...like I am still a young, attractive, happy person who people notice. Something like this...

Va...Va...Va...Voom, right?

Well, maybe it's a little extreme but you get the idea.

But then I'll walk in front of a mirror or the guy I'm crushing on doesn't know I exist and I get kick boxed in the gut with the reality that no matter how I feel on the inside, I am no Jessica Rabbit, and I actually look more like this...

I know this is the part where I'm supposed to know that Fiona is still beautiful and the moral of the Shrek story is there is someone for everyone and that love is all that matters but it doesn't feel like it. It doesn't feel like a fairy tale ending when you are alone. I have great kids, a great job and THE BEST friends in the world but I want more. I want that person to laugh with, to be a couple with, to come home to, to wake up with, to share my life with.

I hate the image I see in the mirror. I don't know that it's always confidence I carry with me. Sometimes it's cloak and dagger. Pulling off the ultimate smoke screen - hiding what's really the equivilent of a scared, nervous teenager half the time. I know that it's up to me to change the image but it's easier said than done. It's hard to get it back. The body, the feeling, the confidence. Maybe someday I'll find a happy medium...

It's Brownhog Day...

Jace is showing me and Dallas all the things he made a pre-school and day care today that are themed around Groundhog's Day but he can't say it right so he keeps calling it a brownhog. And actually he is right..the groundhog is brown...so he is just combining his adjectives and nouns together. Saves time really.

Merry Christmas Mom

I came across this on a plaque in a magazine of all places. I immediately wrote it down as it instantly made me think of my mother. It was originally worded more to apply to someone losing their spouse or significant other but a family member suggested I could change the wording a little to make it apply more to me missing my mother so I did. I thought about waiting 'til Mother's Day to share it but I miss her now at Christmas just as much as I will still be missing her come Mother's Day, so here goes...

I miss you more than ever before.
But, I trust that God will open a door.
And show me how to go on without you.
To give me some hope and comfort too.
For you gave me life and I loved you so dear.
And it breaks my heart to not have you near.
But, life goes on and I will too.
I just wish it wouldn't go on without you.

All my love...

Merry Christmas Mom! We all love you and miss you so much. And when we gather together this weekend for the Kinnison family Christmas it will not be the same without you but you will be in all of our hearts. This is year and all the years to come.

Baby No More...

A Great Gift

I received a great gift last night from someone I haven't seen for probably 20 years. We used to work together at Jacks when we were in high school (we went to different schools though). Anyway, I've been totally into Facebook for the last few weeks and as I get new friends, I totally poach their friends...and in the course of that, I stumbled upon this girl, remembered her from Jacks, and sent her a friend request. The gift came when she accepted the friend request and wrote the following...

"Lori, nice to see you on FB. So sorry about your mom. I often talked to her when she was at Mercy and she always lit up when I asked how you were. She was so proud of you and always said what a great mother you are. She said that you were a hard worker and your family always came first. She loved you very much."

Like I said, I haven't seen or spoken to this person in 20 years. I had no idea she worked at Mercy Hospital. I had never run into her in all the times I visited my mother in the hospital. Occasionally my mom would tell me someone asked about me or said they knew me but I never really figured out who she was talking about. There was one former classmate that I would see there and she would ask about my mom but it wasn't this girl. Anyway, because of being completely clueless all these years that she knew my mother and they had spoken about me, I was completely and utterly shocked and instantly broke down in tears as I read those words. I wrote her back and said...

"OMG you have no idea how much that means to me. I am sure I'm not the first child to feel at times like they never do anything right or don't measure up. My mother and I definitely had a complicated relationship but I figured we each knew deep down how the other felt. I just hope I conveyed that to her enough at the end. I loved her very much too and miss her terribly every single day."

The tears that came were mixed tears of both sorrow and joy. Sorrow over the tremendous loss of the mother I loved so much and the hole that will forever leave in my heart. But joy over this bit of insight into how much my mother loved me as well. It was a great gift and one that I will always, always treasure.

Trusting Your Kids to Do the Right Thing

I brought my son's cell phone to work with me to charge it for him since we are down to one charger and I had left it at work. When I plugged it in and turned it on, I figured it was a prime time to sneak a peak at his text messages. ***I am the mom, I pay the bill, I have the right to do that. How else will I learn if he also calls me a "lazy, fat ass" like my other son did causing me to confiscate his phone for oh...infinity.*** Anyway, one of the texts was from this kid who is having an "Xbox party" tonight and inviting some people over. The string went like this...

SON: I can go on friday

FRIEND: Nice

SON: Ya u want me to bring my xbox

FRIEND: Ya

SON: K

FRIEND: Im buyin 50 bucks of weed

EEE...RRR...HHH...TTTTT (that was supposed to be screeching brakes but it's hard to translate sound effects)

My son had not replied to this message but I immediately called him at home to ask him about it. He said he didn’t know anything about it and had not gotten that message. At first I thought he was covering but then I remembered it was listed as a new message and I had opened it for the first time. It said it was sent on Wednesday but had been stored this morning so I asked him when his phone went dead and he said the day before yesterday – which would have been Wednesday.

I told him I didn’t know now if he was going to be allowed to go over there tonight. That I couldn’t really knowingly send him where there might be drugs. I asked if it was a joke – he didn’t know. I told him to cut the “I don’t know” crap and be straight with me. I asked him if he knew of other times this friend had done that – he said no. And really he doesn’t hang around this friend too much - been to his new house maybe twice. I asked him if this friend does have the stuff, would he do it – he said no. I told him I would have to think about it and probably talk to his dad about it too. (abridged version...we are co-parents from separate households)

I debated about actually talking to his dad though. His parenting style is more "nip it in the bud" than mine. Not saying that's good or bad...not saying my style is good or bad. Just didn't want there to be a rush to judgment if I brought him into the equation too early and then I have to decide whether to honor his wishes or not. I did send him an e-mail though telling him what I knew and asking, "do we trust him?" I also had told my son that I don't want to be "that mom" and call this friend's parents but, I said, “you guys are 15 years old. This is not acceptable.”

I had a gut instinct about how I would proceed but in situations like this you always second guess yourself. I mean, I hated to punish him for something he might not have even done. I really don’t see him doing it because I can see him thinking it’s disgusting…like smoking…but on the other hand…perhaps my parents thought that about me…I mean, I have dabbled a time or two. (confession is good for the soul, right?!)

Surprisingly, his dad came back with..."Well it could have been a joke, tell him we trust him to do the right thing but to keep in my mind we are not stupid so if we are suspicious we will get a urine sample from him and have it tested. I would hate to have it come to that but he is going to be around it and he is going to have to make decisions for himself."

This was how I felt as well. Give him a change to warrant our trust and face the consequences if makes the wrong choice. After we discussed a couple other things and decided that the boys would not be coming to his house this weekend after all since his girlfriend just had an emergency appendectomy last night, he made the comment to smell our son's clothes when he comes home. I said, "Don’t worry – I’ll put the fear of God into him. His clothes may smell of it if he is around it but that doesn’t mean he did it, right? Isn’t that what you meant by “he is going to be around it and he is going to have to make decisions for himself?” What decision would that be? He sticks around but “just says NO” or he leaves completely?"

His response was, "Yes that is what I meant but I am just curious to see if he is actually around it. Make sure that he feels comfortable saying NO and he can call for a ride home anytime it may make him look un-cool but beats the alternative."

So, that's how we are going to play this...let our son clearly know our expectations and the consequences...but give him the freedom to be a situation and do the right thing.

What would you do?

Last Day of NaBloPoMo '08

Here it is...the last day of November...and the last day of NaBloPoMo. I was a newbie this year - a first timer - but it was fun. Most days I actually had things to blog about. Not every post was award winning and a couple days I just rolled the dice and crap shot a few words on the page just to fullfil the requirement of posting everyday but still I did it...and I think I'll be up for it again next year too. My co-workers need a year to recover from me sending them my posts over e-mail all the time. Hey...I gotta drum up readers somehow...at least I haven't resorted to subcribing to my blog for them yet. If you build it, they will come, right?!

Visiting the Folks

So, did you visit your folks over Thanksgiving? I did. This was our first trip back to Missouri and the cemetery were my folks are buried since my mother passed. It's so surreal having lost both my parents and I'm not even 40 yet. I was really leery about this visit and it definitely wasn't easy. At one point, as I was crying, my brother leans over to me and says, "she's not here, you know that right?"

Yes, I know the essence of her is not there in that grave...but that grave...














...that headstone...are a symbol of the life that was her and it's hard to look down at it, to read the etchings and not struggle with missing her.

It's like I could physically feel that I could reach out and pull her back. I can't see her but something feels like if I just reached out, I could touch her but at the same time if I try to reach there is emptiness. I can't reach hard enough or far enough.

I know that in time, it will get easier, the pain will ease just as it did with my dad. That's not to say I don't still miss him too but it's been 21 years. He has been gone longer than I had him with me. I can't even imagine reaching a point when my mother will have been gone just as long.

We brought them flowers. "Them"...they are together now. For the rest of my life "visiting the folks" will mean this...driving 200+ miles to bring them flowers, to tell them how much I miss them and then climb back into a vehicle and drive away, shedding tears, not knowing when I'll be back. Seems almost normal doesn't it? That could describe any one person's visits with their parents. 'Cept it's not and it never will be again.

Open Up...It's the POlice...

That's what I thought I was going to hear when I all of a sudden there was banging on my door at 6:00 am this morning. I must have been semi-awake because I heard voices outside and I thought maybe it was the police at the house 3 houses up who often have loud music all hours of the day and night...in their house and their cars...the occupants and their vistors - it's very annoying. Then all of a sudden there was a banging on my door. Still thinking it was the police, I was trying to figure out why there were at my house. I hadn't called the police, both boys were home and in bed (no eggs being thrown off overpasses that night), I hadn't left the house in almost 24 hours, was someone accusing me of something?, was someone in an accident?, were they looking for someone?

I got up, went to the door, turned on the outside light but I did not open the door because we do not have a screen door and if I open the main door there is nothing between me and whoever is on the other side. I heard someone say, "they're there" and when they came back and knocked again, I asked who it was and they said the water dept. I thought, "oh crap am I being disconnected?". I opened the door and they said there was a water main break right out in front of my house and they would need me to move my vehicle that was parked in the street. I said, "that is not my car, it's my neighbor's girlfriend's". They suggested I move my car out of my driveway anyway because if I needed to go somewhere, they'd be blocking it while they were digging. So, I got dressed and pulled my car into the street, up one house. I crawled back in bed and put my eye mask on since they had huge spotlights shining on my yard. I actually think I was close to going back to sleep when they came again, this time ringing the bell, to tell me that they'd be shutting the water off soon. REALLY?! I could have done without that bullentin. Figured it was a no brainer anyway. I'm like, "no really that's ok, I'm not about to be going ahead and taking a shower or doing any dishes at 6:44 am on MY DAY OFF!"

Once they started digging - there was no way I was going to sleep so I came out on the couch to watch tv. I tried to take some pictures of the huge back-hoe and dumptruck that was in my front yard but since I was laying all stealthlike on my living room floor, peering out the blinds, trying to snap a photo without me or my flash being detected...none of them really turned out.

So, now my front yard is all dug up about 3 feet back from the curb the entire length of my yard. And my mailbox spent most of day laying on top of the pile. When I looked outside when they were done, it appeared they had put the mailbox back in it's rightful place but by noon it had flopped. The boys and I tried several times to prop it up so that they would deliver the mail but it kept falling. I finally stuck it into the fresh dirt they put back and it's holding for now. I believe that is their responsibility to put it back so I guess I'll have to call Monday. But I think I probably should pay my bill first. Righteous indignation kinda looses a bit when you owe that person money.

I'm thinking the inconvenience of my mailbox being a little weak in the knees is better than if that bang on the door really had been to po-po cuz those visits are never a good thing.

My Thanksgiving Quesadilla

Having spent Thanksgiving home alone, I enjoyed a quesadilla for my dinner. Chicken not turkey. And instead of a multitude of leftovers, I know am nuking a Banquet brocolli & cheese rice dish. No, not the traditional Thanksgiving fare but it's ok.

I actually am used to spending Thanksgiving alone. We don't really celebrate it in my family because everyone always went to their in-laws on Thanksgiving Day. When Ken and I were together, we'd go to his aunt & uncle's in Elkader and that was always fun. Sometimes my family will do something the weekend after and this year we will be going to Missouri to my mom's twin sister's house to have Thanksgiving with her and her family. It will be bittersweet though.

This will be our first trip back since my mom's funeral & burial. I have been having a REAL hard time dealing with that. I told my brothers the other night that I don't know if I am ready for it. It was hard enough to leave her back in August - to come home without her - I don't know if I have it in me to do it again. I called my brothers today to wish them a Happy Thanksgiving and it was all I could do to get through the short conversations without crying. I don't know what it was for sure. Was it because there was no 3rd call to make to my mother? Was it because I knew my brother didn't have to pick up a dinner from Hy-Vee this year for her? I don't know...I just know they were just hard calls to make. We didn't spend the day with her but she was always there. There at her house, watching CMT, she was there and this year she isn't. And why didn't we spend more Thanksgivings with her? That's just one more thing to feel guilty about now that she's gone. We totally took advantage of her. Took advantage of the fact that she was alone and "aw, she won't mind if we put her off 'til the weekend". Yeah we'd finally sit down together on another day but it wasn't the same. It's not the same. We always thought there'd be plenty of time. "There's always next year". But what about when there isn't a next year? There is no more time to call her and wish her happiness. The best we can do is hope with all our hearts she has found it.

Charlie Brown is alive and well ...(and other random thoughts for the evening)...

**Disclaimer: some of these thoughts may be alchohol induced...

The beloved cartoon character, Charlie Brown, is alive and well and patrons our own Bushwood where in CR. He must have ditched Lucy and Peppermint Patty and was actually on a date but he had the trademark yellow sweater with the black line across the front (ok it was a straight line, not a squiggly line but it still so counts). He even had the same head shape and a surprising very similar hair do. I seriously tried to get a picture but didn't have my camera and couldn't get close enough with my camera phone without drawing attention to myself. But they sat at the table directly in front of us and I was totally distracted by the uber Peanut one the rest of the night.

How can the same person wear a size 7 underwear but a size 16 pants? How can the measurement almost double when the only thing between the underwear and the pants is the actual width of the underwear itself- which is about paper thin? So if you wear a size 0 jeans, what size underwear do you wear? Are there negative sizes? Go commando at that point?

Allegedly according to the WE Network's "Sex Change Hospital"...for a male to become a woman, they invert the penis so that the shaft now acts as a vagina. What they do with the muscle and tissue that was inside the penis? I do not know. However, using that same logic, someone tried to say they do the opposite for a woman wishing to become male...that they take the wall of the vagina and stretch it outward. How could this be? How is there enough skin to stretch as far as a penis stretches when its erect? And what make it erect? Is there a penial implant?

If you plug your nose when you sneeze, could you pop your eyeballs out?

If I go to bed right now will I remember any of this in the morning?

Stay tuned to find out!

and you get a new car, and you a new car, and you get a new car...NOT

Why is it that some people seem to have everything handed to them in life and others, no matter how hard they try, never seem to get anything? Why is that some people can get to be 30 some years old and mommy & daddy are still bailing them out at every turn and others pushing 40 or 50 or even 60 have lost everything? How is it someone can get picked up for OWI, rack up a couple thousand dollars in fines, legal fees and car repairs (an accident was also involved), have their parents through a bunch of money at the problem and then for their reward, mommy & daddy also buy them A NEW STINKIN' CAR?! Where's the trip to Disney World? Waiting 'til he quits his job and files bankruptcy for that one? How is it someone can choose to divorce said person and lose not one, but two houses in the process and this person walks away with one of those houses and A NEW STINKIN' CAR?! How can this person think its fair that he never has to grow up and fend for himself when the other person struggles for every little thing? I need a new car...no one is handing me one. I need a house of our own (renting bites)...no one is handing me one. I earned one on my own, all by myself, without a man long before I met this person and sold it to buy one together. Of course I am a hypocrite because the afore mentioned parents gave us the money but that also leads to how I lost two houses. The one we sold (mine) and the one he kept when our marriage was over. I don't need a 40" hdtv but I'd like one. Don't see me charging one on a credit card mommy & daddy already paid off once and then telling them I won it at work. I just gon't understand why life is so easy for some - they always come out smelling like roses - and it's so hard for others. I haven't made the best financial decisions in my life but nothing was handed to me either. I earned everything I had and if I lost it then I had to deal with that. No one stepped in to bail me out. My mom helped when she could but not to the tune of $130,000 or $15,000 at the drop of a hat. I suppose it's a good gig if you can get it. When I found out I was thinking, "it must be nice to have parents save you all the time" and then for a moment I even thought, "it must be nice to have parents". Mine are gone. I couldn't fall back on them even if I wanted to. Even if they wanted to. I can't. I can't. I can't. I've got no where to go and I just don't know what I'm going to do.

this day can go RIGHT in the shit hole...

I've had a really shitty day. Started about 6:30 am when instead of walking out the door for work like I should have been doing, I decided to load up the (13) boxes of cookie dough, (3) pies, (1) cheesecake, (1) mini pizzas, (1) mini tacos and (1) pumpkin roll that was purchased by my co-workers from my son's fundraiser. That brillant move and that brillant hour started me on a path of downward destruction the likes of which my mind was surely lucky to have survived. I think the jury may still be out on that one though. Deciding if I am competent to have known the consequences of my actions no doubt. I don't think my boss (of 12 years) has ever heard me say "fuck me, fuck me, fuck me" (and with such conviction) 'til today when I totally fucked up a new application in our software. And that was one of the last things to go wrong throughout the day. I suppose all was well after I completely deleted the application and all if it's accumulated data, restored the application (minus the data), sent out a notification that I had fucked it up and asked everyone to re-enter their information but by then my stomach was so tied in knots it physically hurt. It still does - I feel like I could puke. And if the Exedrin Migraine doesn't kick in soon I'm switching to Black & Decker brand...ball-peen formula. But I'm sure "The Devil Went Down to Georgia" blaring 2 feet behind me on Guitar Hero is going to lull me to sleep long before the need for that. Wake me when mall hair, Menudo and leg warmers are back in style!

'twas the night before...

Isn't there something in the "Twas the Night Before Christmas" story about just settling in for a long winter's rest when on the roof there arose such a clatter, I sprung from my bed to see what was the matter? Well, let's see...twas the night before a new work week and I had just nessled into my bed, had visions of all things pumpkin dancing in my head, the clatter was my brain realizing I had not blogged yet today, I sprang from bed thinking what could it matter. Oh but it does matter...for 8 more NaBloPoMo days it matters.

So, as long as I was envisioning pumpkin...as in pumpkin desserts...I might as well go with that flow. I've been assigned to bring a pumpkin dessert for our holiday dinner at work and before going to bed I had double checked the recipe for the Traditional Pumpkin Pie I would be making out of Jello pudding, milk, and a ready made grahmn cracker crust. That's about as traditional as I get. I've never baked a real pumpkin pie and my oven only heats up on top, no bottom, so I don't think I'd have much luck trying it this year. I'd love to make my mom's pumpkin cake but 1) I cannot hold a candle to her magery (I think that's a combination of magic & mastery) when it comes to pumpkin cake and 2) I've already established that my oven is a POS.

So, yes I am taking the easy way out. But I could take it one step easier further and simply bring this totally yummy looking Pumpkin Roll I bought from my son's DC fundraiser. It's pumpkin something or other rolled jellyroll style with a cream cheese mixture. Then I wouldn't have to put in any effort at all 'cept getting it out of the freezer that morning. But I think I'll hold off and take that for my contribution to our family dinner in Missouri next weekend. I'm sure the 4 hour trip will thaw it nicely to be able to serve at dinner. **Note to self: place pumpkin roll in a Tupperware container with my name on it so it looks like I actually made it.

I do love all things pumpkin. Can't wait 'til this time of year for the pumpkin shakes at Culver's. They also have a Pumpkin Pecan Cement Mixer (ala DQ's Blizzards) that I have to try. Speaking of Blizzards...DQ has the Pumpkin Pie Blizzard with a dollop of whip cream. Now, I figured they only had this heavenly concoction this time of year like Culver's, but I discovered earlier this year that the 6th St. DQ has them year round. Makes a girl's heart aflutter. I love pumpkin bread - especially with chocolate chips in it (best of two worlds). Pumpkin bars - especially with the cream cheese frosting. Hy-Vee was carrying pumpkin doughnut holes this year that I have never had. I have GOT to try the pumpkin pancakes at IHOP this year before it's too late. I think these would be to die for with their hazlenut syrup. "The Great Pumpkin Charlie Brown" is my favorite story. I'm just kidding but I was on a roll. Rolls - are there pumpkin rolls?

My love for pumpkin stems all the way back to when I was a kid and also connects me to my love for my grandmother. Now, she actually baked pumpkin pies and I would take the left over filling, freeze it, and eat it later as...whatelse?...pumpkin ice cream. I was ahead of my time. Baskin Robbins could have hired me to create flavors. Speaking of ice cream places...Cold Stone Creamery has a super awesome pumpkin ice cream cake (it's not all ice cream...there is cake too and it's awesome).

So, there you have it...I blogged today...and not just about nothing...but about one of my favorite things. I'm not usually a coffee drinker but if I don't get to bed I'm going to have to hit Starbucks in the morning for their Pumpkin Spice Latte.

Sweet Dreams Everyone!

Proud Mother Moment

There was a parent's meeting this morning for freshman basketball. You know...meet the coaches, go over a few guidelines, the basics. This year is already pretty cool because one of the freshman coaches (Brendon's coach) is former Iowa stand out Kenyon Murray. They stated at the meeting that each week they were going to award the player who showed they were the "toughest" in practice - hussled for the most loose balls, took charges, snagged the most rebounds, etc - that person would be given a jersey that says "TOUGHNESS WINS" to wear all the next week at practice and they get to be co-captian at the games that week. At the meeting, they called all the players up, introduced them, then awarded the jersey. When Kenyon introduced Brendon he called him Mighty Might and when he started to talk about who was getting the jersey for the 1st week, he says...

"if you look at this kid, you might think ah maybe he can't play the best. He is the smallest kid on the team but he's got the most heart. He got 3 offensive rebounds this week, he is climbing right over these big guys. You can't always tell a player by his size and this kid showed so that"

...and he award the jersey to Brendon. I may have paraphrased the last couple words...by then the tears were welling up in my eyes and I realized maybe I should pull myself together before my lips starting quivering into that ugly crying face. It was a very proud moment.

It's no secret Brendon is the smallest kid on most his teams. And I do worry about him because of it. All I want is for people to give him a chance to prove he's got game cuz he does. He was cut once from a friend's baseball team because the parent coaches cared more about winning then friendship. His next team, he was invited to play. After a couple years, they decided to have tryouts instead of automatic placement on the team. I was worried they would cut him because of his size. When they didn't I was thankful and told the coach so. He said basically the same thing Kenyon said this morning, "it's not so much about size but heart". Brendon is a scraper and he has natural talent. Does he have to work harder than the other kids to show it, yeah. But being recognized today shows that he isn't afraid of putting in the work. Of course he is going to swim in that jersey but who cares!

He also won this week's free throw shooting contest making 10 out of 10. He won a school free throw contest when he was in 8th grade and advanced to the city all around but then bombed out. O/well...even Michael Jordon had off days !

There are only 16 kids out for freshman basketball this year and they are broken into two 8-man teams so he will be seeing plenty of playing time compared to middle school when 60 some kids went out. I think this is going to be a good year for him. Proving you don't have to be 6 foot tall to be one of the best. He could be the next Muggsy Bogues or Spud Webb (I actually knew those names...no one had to tell me who they were...I get points for that.)

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Anyway, I was a very proud momma this morning.

Senior Year Memories - CR Prairie Class of '88

We got this in one of those "getting to know you" e-mails but this one was different...it was about Senior Year. It as kinda fun to go back there. Feel free to copy to your blog and fill in your memories - tag some friends to do it too - put the name of your high school and year in the title.

CR Prairie High School - Class of '88

1. Did you date someone from your school? Not senior year. Wish I had though – there are a couple that come to mind that I think were possibilities

2. Did you marry someone from your high school? No

3. Did you car pool to school? No – drove myself

4. What kind of car did you have? ’78 Ford Pinto

5. What kind of car do you have now? ’98 Dodge Durango

6 . It's Friday night...where are you now? Home or out with friends

7. It is Friday night...where are you then? Football game or cruisin’ 1st Ave

8. What kind of job did you have in high school? Hardee’s and Jack’s Discount store

9. What kind of job do you do now? Workforce Database Administrator - payroll

10. Were you a party animal? Not really

11. Were you considered a flirt? Maybe?

12. Were you in band, orchestra, or choir? choir

13. Were you a nerd? No

14. Did you get suspended or expelled? Got in-school suspension twice…once for walking into a class and calling a girl out to fight and once for unpaid parking tickets

15. Can you sing the fight song? YES I CAN (see here)

16. Who was/were your favorite teacher? Since Spanish was my favorite subject I guess I’d have to say Roxy Schreiber

17. Where did you sit during lunch? at home, didn't have to be at school 'til 1:30 pm

18. What was your school's full name? It’s actually College Community but it’s commonly called Cedar Rapids Prairie High School

19. When did you graduate? 1988

20. What was your school mascot? Hawk

21. If you could go back and do it again, would you? yes – less stressful then

22. Did you have fun at Prom? Sort of…my boyfriend was really jealous so he would freak at every guy I talked to

23. Do you still talk to the person you went to Prom with? No – I think he lives in Nebraska now

24. Are you planning on going to your next reunion? Probably – I’ve been to all the others

25. Do you still talk to people from school? Yes.

26. School Colors? orange and black