Ever heard the saying "you never want the ones that are good for you" or that "good girls have a thing for bad boys". I've found it to be true, I know friends who have found it to be true and watching Lulu falling for Johnny on General Hospital (following in her mother, Laura's footsteps), it made me wonder why do we always think we can save bad boys?
It actually can work. I have a friend who spent many painstaking years waiting for her boyfriend turned husband to give up drinking and staying out with friends. They've been married 10 years and have one of the most REAL deal marriages I have ever seen. I truly admire the mutual respect and love they have for each other. They are truly partners in the love and laughter that fills their marriage AND their home. Their family is their #1 priority, he a stay at home dad while she works and they both go to school. I seriously do not know two parents more involved with their kids. The amount of togetherness this family packs into a weekend let alone an entire Christmas or summer vacation blows me away. They find activities inside and outside the home that truly gives substance and culture and enrichment to their kids and seeing the pure joy on their little faces in turn gives their marriage substance and enrichment.
That's not to say it was easy. Having had both a close and sometimes distance ring side seat over the 15 years of their relationship, I know it wasn't, but the pay off...oh the pay off must feel...well, peaceful...comforting. Comforting to know that love can concur. Love of a good woman can change a man. Being willing to love at all costs, being willing to let love in, CAN in the end give you every happiness you ever dreamed possible.
But I've also seen where it doesn't work. I have another friend who spend too many years in a couple dead-end relationships. Over time in both those relationships love turned to isolation. I'm sure she felt the same way many do...that if I just love him enough...it will be enough. But it wasn't and sometimes it's just not. Sometimes for no one's fault and as painful as it can be...sometimes love is not enough. Those guys never took her love for what it was. They never allowed themselves to truly feel what she had to offer them. People like that will always end up paying a lifetime for never letting love in but my friend paid too.
The good news is, it didn't destroy her. She is a very smart, strong, independent woman who as alone as she may feel from time to time, as scared as she may feel from time to time is on her own path, on her own terms and I know she will be ok.
So, again, why? Why do we try to save the boys...these men, who for all intense purposes are either so wrong for us or are seemingly a lost cause.
I know a guy who I think is very funny, we laugh together. There is a mutual respect there and sometimes I think maybe a mutual attraction. An attraction stemming first from the friendship we share. Right now, even if it were true, neither of us would act on it. Amongst the people we both know, and probably unbeknowst to him, he has become somewhat of a joke, a laughing stock because of how he acts sometimes. Since I obviously think I have a junior psychology degree, my personal opinion is that he acts that way out of hurt and bitterness of a failed relationship. Someone who loved tremendously and lost. Knowing all to well how that feels, I'm starting to have thoughts that if in another time, if things were different and I were to offer my understanding and lend an ear for him to finally let his guard down and let go of the hurt...could that lead to something more? Could that mutual respect and genuine fun we have with each other build to something good?
Then it all comes crashing down and I tell myself to snap out of it. He probably sees me as nothing more than a friend and no amount of "I'm here for you...let me help you" will change that. I know that this is probably closer to reality than any fantasy I'm building in my head so how do I stop myself from crashing and burning here? How do I get off this train wreck before I make a fool of myself and break my own heart in the process?
Do good girls ever get over their attraction to bad boys?
Sunday, January 27, 2008
Wednesday, January 23, 2008
Could you pick your kid out of line up?
I don't know about you but my kids sound extremely alike on the phone. I cannot tell them apart. In my defense, they are both boys and roughly the same age (1 year apart). Many a times I have been talking to one and ask to speak to them and they will be like "ahh, this is ______". Oops - sorry - that's embarrassing.
This morning I called home to make sure they were up, showering and to remind Brendon to take back this one sheet for the DC trip that was supposed to be turned in last Friday. I was pretty sure I was talking to Brendon but not wanting to embarass myself by inadvertently telling Dallas to take the DC sheet back when he isn't going to DC himself for another year, I was desperately listening for some clue that I had the right child.
I tried to get him to talk in full sentence answers rather than just one word responses so I had more to go on. That didn't work.
I tried to get him to say if Dallas was showering so then I would know for sure this was Brendon so I asked, "which one of you is showering now?". DUH! I'm pretty sure the stupidity of that wasn't lost on even a 1/2 asleep teenager. How could he be talking to me if he was the one in the shower? Very true but still didn't give me an indication of which one I was talking too.
I was starting to panic...how am I going to tell Brendon or get the message to Brendon about that sheet that HAD to go back today without it being painfully obviously I don't know my kids very well?
Out of desperation, I asked, "did you find something to wear?", hoping that he would actually say what he was going to wear and that would be my indicator. Brendon, being so picky about jeans, hardly has any to wear so 9 times out of 10 wears those nylon running pants. He has them in several colors so if I got, "yeah, my red (or blue or black) pants and...", then I would know I was talking to Brendon. But all I got was, "yeah". Com'on - help a girl out here!
Finally, since I obviously was not clever enough to play Vulcan mind games with my son, I gave up and simply said, "oh yeah, there is a sheet on the table to needs to go back for the DC trip" . I figured that was safe and if I truly was talking to Brendon he would know he needed to get that and if I was talking to Dallas he would understand by the words "DC trip" that it's important and he will tell his brother.
Either way, I'm sure when I get home tonight I'll see the sheet still sitting on the table.
This morning I called home to make sure they were up, showering and to remind Brendon to take back this one sheet for the DC trip that was supposed to be turned in last Friday. I was pretty sure I was talking to Brendon but not wanting to embarass myself by inadvertently telling Dallas to take the DC sheet back when he isn't going to DC himself for another year, I was desperately listening for some clue that I had the right child.
I tried to get him to talk in full sentence answers rather than just one word responses so I had more to go on. That didn't work.
I tried to get him to say if Dallas was showering so then I would know for sure this was Brendon so I asked, "which one of you is showering now?". DUH! I'm pretty sure the stupidity of that wasn't lost on even a 1/2 asleep teenager. How could he be talking to me if he was the one in the shower? Very true but still didn't give me an indication of which one I was talking too.
I was starting to panic...how am I going to tell Brendon or get the message to Brendon about that sheet that HAD to go back today without it being painfully obviously I don't know my kids very well?
Out of desperation, I asked, "did you find something to wear?", hoping that he would actually say what he was going to wear and that would be my indicator. Brendon, being so picky about jeans, hardly has any to wear so 9 times out of 10 wears those nylon running pants. He has them in several colors so if I got, "yeah, my red (or blue or black) pants and...", then I would know I was talking to Brendon. But all I got was, "yeah". Com'on - help a girl out here!
Finally, since I obviously was not clever enough to play Vulcan mind games with my son, I gave up and simply said, "oh yeah, there is a sheet on the table to needs to go back for the DC trip" . I figured that was safe and if I truly was talking to Brendon he would know he needed to get that and if I was talking to Dallas he would understand by the words "DC trip" that it's important and he will tell his brother.
Either way, I'm sure when I get home tonight I'll see the sheet still sitting on the table.
Monday, January 21, 2008
Workplace Bathroom Etiquette
I'm no Miss Manners but I'm pretty sure it's not polite for one co-worker to laugh when in the bathroom with another co-worker and the other co-worker let's out (3) loud, thundering farts. Without naming names (because I don't know who the other person was), all I'm going to say is that I was the one holding back the 12 year old kid urges to start laughing. I have, however, been giggling ever since. I SO have not grown up yet! HAHAHA.
If you thought that was funny. Check this out...
How To Poop at Work
If you thought that was funny. Check this out...
How To Poop at Work
Saturday, January 19, 2008
That's the ACTUAL temperature man!
I was telling my son last night how frickin' cold it's going to be today and found myself using that new term "actual temperature". So it went something like this..."it's going to be a high tommorrow of 4 below...well, actual temperature anyway...with the wind chill it will feel like 30 below".
I think the gravity of it was mostly lost on my 14 year old who finally this year started to wear a winter coat again rather than just a hooded sweatshirt on even the coldest days but it struck me as funny. When did we start using the term "actual temperature"? At some point could we just not fathom the scale of it? Something like this...
Dude #1: The high tomorrow is going to be 4 below!
Dude #2: WHAT?!!
Dude #1 (again): Yeah, that's the ACTUAL temperature!
Or, was it because simply saying that it was going to below zero just didn't convey how gosh damn colder than a witch's tit, colder than a well digger's ass in January (or any other old saying my parent's used to use) it really was going to be outside, so we had to come up with something that made it sound even worse. Something like this...
Dude #1: The high tomorrow is going to be 4 below!
Dude #2: WHAT?!!
Dude #1 (again): Yeah, and that's just the actual temperature, with the wind chill it's going to feel more like 30 below!
Either way you slice it, we live in the midwest, so the below zero tempertures, wind chills, and all the ways we can come up with to describe that we are going to freeze our bejeezes off are a part of life! Think I'll get started on post cards to everyone I know in warmer climates saying "WISH YOU WERE HERE". I'm sure they will booking flights for a visit as soon as they can.
I think the gravity of it was mostly lost on my 14 year old who finally this year started to wear a winter coat again rather than just a hooded sweatshirt on even the coldest days but it struck me as funny. When did we start using the term "actual temperature"? At some point could we just not fathom the scale of it? Something like this...
Dude #1: The high tomorrow is going to be 4 below!
Dude #2: WHAT?!!
Dude #1 (again): Yeah, that's the ACTUAL temperature!
Or, was it because simply saying that it was going to below zero just didn't convey how gosh damn colder than a witch's tit, colder than a well digger's ass in January (or any other old saying my parent's used to use) it really was going to be outside, so we had to come up with something that made it sound even worse. Something like this...
Dude #1: The high tomorrow is going to be 4 below!
Dude #2: WHAT?!!
Dude #1 (again): Yeah, and that's just the actual temperature, with the wind chill it's going to feel more like 30 below!
Either way you slice it, we live in the midwest, so the below zero tempertures, wind chills, and all the ways we can come up with to describe that we are going to freeze our bejeezes off are a part of life! Think I'll get started on post cards to everyone I know in warmer climates saying "WISH YOU WERE HERE". I'm sure they will booking flights for a visit as soon as they can.
Monday, January 14, 2008
New BFF
Apparently I don't have to be sad about Misti moving anymore. I have a new BFF.
Last night Jace and I were coloring (something you never outgrow by the way) and he very simply stated, "I'm your best friend".
Can't argue with that and who would want to! He is the sweetest little boy. He also told me a did a really good job coloring!
Last night Jace and I were coloring (something you never outgrow by the way) and he very simply stated, "I'm your best friend".
Can't argue with that and who would want to! He is the sweetest little boy. He also told me a did a really good job coloring!
Saturday, January 12, 2008
Shaking Things Up
I shook up my blog today. I liked my old blog colors but was frustrated with the font color that when I would bold something the dramatic effectiveness, empathicness, yes - sometimes insaneness (I'm allowed to make up words as I go) to truly show through. I would end up not only bolding but also italicing and even underlining and still it wouldn't come across with the full gusto it was intended. For a drama queen/control freak I couldn't let it go. What is the point of putting all your insanity in writing if the full craziness can't be conveyed?!
Having said that, since blue is my favorite color, I wanted to stick with that but I like the pink and burgandy I added too. All and all, I am happy with it at this moment and that's all anyone can ask for really.
So, shaking up my blog is about all the shaking I've done today. Unless you count spinning myself around in my desk chair like a kid at the beauty shop with their mother (flashback) until I got REALLY dizzy waiting for my internet to load. I know I felt shaky after that.
Pretty much the only other things I've done is practically push my kids out the door to go to their dad's for the rest of the weekend then proceeded to lay on the couch the rest of the day catching up on dvr. When I got bored with that I would see what was actually on cable. I would start to watch something and ADD would kick in, couldn't stand waiting through the commericals so I started dvr-ing everything I stumbled across so I could watch it later and fast forward. Oh yeah trying to take laziness to a new level.
Not wanting to leave the house I ordered a pizza for myself - a LARGE pizza just for me. But see now I have breakfast and lunch tomorrow covered too. Got into a shouting match with the pizza order taker guy. I'm pretty sure he probably spit on my pizza after that or had someone else do it. JERKS!
BUT I did manage to jump in the shower before the pizza got here and slip into a clean version of the exact same thing I already had on...black sweats and a blue long sleeve t-shirt. Now why did I decide at 4:30 pm to finally take a shower? I have no idea. Did I need to be all fresh and lovely for the pizza delivery person? I say person because it ended up being a short, middle aged waif of a woman who I scared the crap out of when I opened the door just as she stepped up to it.
So I pigged out on ham & mushroom pizza while reading the new Soap Opera Digest and then laid down to watch "Picture Perfect" with Jennifer Aniston. Good movie. I caught a few zzz's through the part where they stage the fight and later she confesses the whole scam...the "dressing for the job I wanted" speech.
Read my friend's blog...shout out to The Bean Blog...and here I am...and here I go.
Having said that, since blue is my favorite color, I wanted to stick with that but I like the pink and burgandy I added too. All and all, I am happy with it at this moment and that's all anyone can ask for really.
So, shaking up my blog is about all the shaking I've done today. Unless you count spinning myself around in my desk chair like a kid at the beauty shop with their mother (flashback) until I got REALLY dizzy waiting for my internet to load. I know I felt shaky after that.
Pretty much the only other things I've done is practically push my kids out the door to go to their dad's for the rest of the weekend then proceeded to lay on the couch the rest of the day catching up on dvr. When I got bored with that I would see what was actually on cable. I would start to watch something and ADD would kick in, couldn't stand waiting through the commericals so I started dvr-ing everything I stumbled across so I could watch it later and fast forward. Oh yeah trying to take laziness to a new level.
Not wanting to leave the house I ordered a pizza for myself - a LARGE pizza just for me. But see now I have breakfast and lunch tomorrow covered too. Got into a shouting match with the pizza order taker guy. I'm pretty sure he probably spit on my pizza after that or had someone else do it. JERKS!
BUT I did manage to jump in the shower before the pizza got here and slip into a clean version of the exact same thing I already had on...black sweats and a blue long sleeve t-shirt. Now why did I decide at 4:30 pm to finally take a shower? I have no idea. Did I need to be all fresh and lovely for the pizza delivery person? I say person because it ended up being a short, middle aged waif of a woman who I scared the crap out of when I opened the door just as she stepped up to it.
So I pigged out on ham & mushroom pizza while reading the new Soap Opera Digest and then laid down to watch "Picture Perfect" with Jennifer Aniston. Good movie. I caught a few zzz's through the part where they stage the fight and later she confesses the whole scam...the "dressing for the job I wanted" speech.
Read my friend's blog...shout out to The Bean Blog...and here I am...and here I go.
Thursday, January 10, 2008
Moms Are Superheroes
Have you seen the commerical for Nature Made vitamins where the little girl is sitting on the steps and says...
... "mom's are superheros...'cept no one even knows it...they are secret superheroes...(dramatic pause)...that's powerful"...
I thought how wonderful it would be to know that my kids think of me as their hero. Will they ever?
Will Brendon think I'm a superhero when I have to choose paying rent (that is already late) over his Washington, DC trip? I got a paper home last night that the final payment has to be postmarked by January 19th. I love that term "final payment", love how it implies I've actually been the dutiful mother the last 5 months and had actually been paying the $200 a month payments the trip cooridinators set up. I think I may have paid $200 overall toward the whole $1000 trip up to now. I have no idea where I'm going to come up with the rest considering I finally broke down and put the Durango in the shop today after the "Check Engine" light has been on for almost 2 months.
I'm pretty sure I already fell from superhero status when Dallas didn't get the big boy/girl birthday party he asked for.
This certainly isn't how I wanted to live my life. I wish I didn't have to choose between rent or a class trip, between Christmas for all three or a big birthday for one, between second hand or the mall. It doesn't feel very superhero-y. It feels pretty bad.
Now some would say if it really is a choice between rent and a class trip then it's a no-brainer and the kid will just have to understand that a place to live is more important that a place to visit. And I know that too in my head but I remember how crushing it was to be the kid who never got to go on any of those trips. Who even 20 years later when the friends who got to go reminisce stills feels bad they didn't get to go. Who remembers how embarrassing it was to still be wearing Lee straight leg jeans when everyone else was wearing Lee pinstrip jeans (80's reference). To always be one trend behind the times. I wanted to be the mom who could give more to my kids and I'm soooooooo not.
It does make me wonder if my mom felt this way. Did it break her heart to have to say no the way it does mine? Of course back then I thought they were heartless for saying no. But I did get to go on one trip and it was actually a big one. I did get to go to Mexico for a week for Spanish class the summer between my junior and senior year. As I've been trying to figure how I'm going to pay for Brendon's trip, I found myself wondering if all my friends who went to DC when we were in jr high knew what it cost their parent's for them to go. Probably not. Or did the same kids who got to go to Chicago in high school know what it cost? Probably not. Do I have any idea what it cost my parents for me to go to Mexico? NO! I'm sure that was more costly than DC or Chicago especially in a summer that when it was over my dad had lost his battle with cancer.
I've long known that my parents and even my brother sheltered me from a lot of my dad's illness so that I could experience high school. But did they ever know they were superheroes? Probably not.
So, you see, history repeats itself in many ways. Not only do I have no more money than my parents did to provide the extra things for my kids but also my kids have no more idea than I did back then what my parents went through to provide what we did have.
So what truly makes parents superheroes? Is it the extras they can provide or sheltering their kids from the struggles of providing what they can?
Who are the superheroes in your life? Do they know?
... "mom's are superheros...'cept no one even knows it...they are secret superheroes...(dramatic pause)...that's powerful"...
I thought how wonderful it would be to know that my kids think of me as their hero. Will they ever?
Will Brendon think I'm a superhero when I have to choose paying rent (that is already late) over his Washington, DC trip? I got a paper home last night that the final payment has to be postmarked by January 19th. I love that term "final payment", love how it implies I've actually been the dutiful mother the last 5 months and had actually been paying the $200 a month payments the trip cooridinators set up. I think I may have paid $200 overall toward the whole $1000 trip up to now. I have no idea where I'm going to come up with the rest considering I finally broke down and put the Durango in the shop today after the "Check Engine" light has been on for almost 2 months.
I'm pretty sure I already fell from superhero status when Dallas didn't get the big boy/girl birthday party he asked for.
This certainly isn't how I wanted to live my life. I wish I didn't have to choose between rent or a class trip, between Christmas for all three or a big birthday for one, between second hand or the mall. It doesn't feel very superhero-y. It feels pretty bad.
Now some would say if it really is a choice between rent and a class trip then it's a no-brainer and the kid will just have to understand that a place to live is more important that a place to visit. And I know that too in my head but I remember how crushing it was to be the kid who never got to go on any of those trips. Who even 20 years later when the friends who got to go reminisce stills feels bad they didn't get to go. Who remembers how embarrassing it was to still be wearing Lee straight leg jeans when everyone else was wearing Lee pinstrip jeans (80's reference). To always be one trend behind the times. I wanted to be the mom who could give more to my kids and I'm soooooooo not.
It does make me wonder if my mom felt this way. Did it break her heart to have to say no the way it does mine? Of course back then I thought they were heartless for saying no. But I did get to go on one trip and it was actually a big one. I did get to go to Mexico for a week for Spanish class the summer between my junior and senior year. As I've been trying to figure how I'm going to pay for Brendon's trip, I found myself wondering if all my friends who went to DC when we were in jr high knew what it cost their parent's for them to go. Probably not. Or did the same kids who got to go to Chicago in high school know what it cost? Probably not. Do I have any idea what it cost my parents for me to go to Mexico? NO! I'm sure that was more costly than DC or Chicago especially in a summer that when it was over my dad had lost his battle with cancer.
I've long known that my parents and even my brother sheltered me from a lot of my dad's illness so that I could experience high school. But did they ever know they were superheroes? Probably not.
So, you see, history repeats itself in many ways. Not only do I have no more money than my parents did to provide the extra things for my kids but also my kids have no more idea than I did back then what my parents went through to provide what we did have.
So what truly makes parents superheroes? Is it the extras they can provide or sheltering their kids from the struggles of providing what they can?
Who are the superheroes in your life? Do they know?
Thursday, January 03, 2008
Farewell to Misti & Marty!
Yes, I know they aren't gone forEVER but gone just the same. Today my friends, Misti & Marty (and their daughter, Amber) left to start their new life in Texas. I know that even though they were still packing at 6:00 pm last night, they wanted to leave town around 8:00 or 9:00 am this morning. It's about a 16 hr drive so if they are driving straight through...they aren't even there yet.Man I am going to miss her!
We have known each other for 20 YEARS! I know that probably really shows our age but not really since we met while still in the womb when our mom's were in lamaze class! HAHA. We actually met in high school when we were both working at Jack's. Lost track for awhile after high school but looked each other up, became roommates for awhile and have been the greatest of friends ever since. She definitely could always make me laugh and I'll miss that.
I can't believe she won't just be an e-mail or phone call away from hooking up for lunch on any given day. No more montly AA Meetings at Hacienda. For some reason the last two days I can't get that song "Seasons in the Sun" (<-- click here) out of my head when thinking about her leaving. HAHA. You know... "we had joy, we had fun, we had seasons in the sun...". I think it's because of that line... "goodbye to you my trusted friend..." .
I truly am happy for them, they are so excited about this move and are looking forward to the fresh start. See here how they can hardly contain themselves...
HAHAHAHAHAHA...she is going to KILL me for that one. Have I mentioned how much I will miss her??!!
*
Well, let's see there is Logan's graduation this spring and her high school reunion this summer and next thing we know the holidays will be around again so until then "my trusted friend", I wish you all the happiness in the world and as my dad once wrote for me... MAY YOUR FUTURE ALWAYS BE A BRIGHT AS YOU ARE!!
U R
2 Good
2 Be
4 Gotten
U R
2 Good
2 Be
4 Gotten
Saturday, December 29, 2007
Protect Your Largest Organ...
Have you heard of this campaign? It's for skin cancer awareness...your skin being your largest organ. I stumbled acrossed it on Soap Opera Town USA where I check up on General Hospital happenings (I know I have NO life) and one of the stars of GH, Jason Thompson (HOTTIE to the maxx) is one of the models for the campaign.
Check this out...
Check this out...
http://www.ghfanclub.com/indextshirt.html
or other celebs at
http://www.marcjacobs.com/ under Special Items, look for the Protect Your Largest Organ slogan.
Friday, December 21, 2007
My Baby is 3 today...
Today is Jace's 3rd birthday. My baby is growing up. Look how perfect he was 3 years ago today! Not that he isn't still perfect. He is one funny little boy. Light of our lives.
He woke up this morning being the "not a 6:30 in morning person" that he is saying NO it was NOT his birthday. All the time I sang Happy Birthday to him, he was saying NO.
By time we got to day care, he was all for it. Couldn't wait to get inside and say he was 3!
The Middle Name Meme...
Ok I admit, I have NO CLUE what I am doing today with this post. The only thing I know for sure I am supposed to do is take the letters of my middle name and come up with a word starting with each letter than tells something about me. Other than that I am suppose to also post the rules of the game and tag other players. Here is why I am confused...these are the rules as they were presented to me...
1. You have to post these rules before you give the facts.
2. Players, you must list one fact that is somehow relevant to your life for each letter of your middle name. If you don’t have a middle name, use the middle name you would have liked to have had.
3. If you are tagged you need to write your own blog-post containing your own middle name game facts.
4. At the end of your blog-post, you need to choose one person for each letter of your middle name to tag.
#3 is where I am first confused..."post...your own middle name game facts"...does this mean I make up my own rules...OH WAIT...blonde moment..."rules" and "facts" being two totally different things here. "Rules" being 1 - 4 above and "facts" being yet to be determined because I haven't listed my middle name with it's words/"facts" yet. OK I GET IT NOW...SEE JUST GIVE ME A SECOND OR TWO AND I CAN EVENTUALLY CATCH ON!!
BUT...I am still confused on #4, if I tag someone, they have to post to their blog continuing the game. I don't know any other bloggers than myself and the person who tagged me. I suppose, if I tag someone, they can do theirs in e-mail. I'll just send them my blog posting.
MAN - this is TOO hard. I can't handle the pressure! I am so not mainstreamed yet into blogger society.
So, here goes, the "rules" again are:
1. You have to post these rules before you give the facts.
2. Players, you must list one fact that is somehow relevant to your life for each letter of your middle name. If you don’t have a middle name, use the middle name you would have liked to have had.
3. If you are tagged you need to write your own blog-post containing your own middle name game facts.
4. At the end of your blog-post, you need to choose one person for each letter of your middle name to tag.
A - Animals. As in the stuffed variety. I used to collect stuffed animals. I had them all over my head board and even hanging on the wall above my bed. As I've been forced (kicking and screaming) to grow up, over the years, I've only kept the ones that have meaning and let the others go. I wish I could say I gave them to a good charity or something but to be honest, I don't know what ever became of them. Maybe they are on the Isle of Misfit Toys.
N - Naughty. I have an evil twin named, Lola, who says all the naughty things Lori is too nice to say. Lola can come out at any time, tends to swear like a sailor, and is the queen of sarcasism.
N - I was going to cop out and use Nice but that's too easy. So, let's go with Nap. OH, how I love to take me a nap. I don't get them as often since Jace thinks he is too old for them now. A great day would involve more than one nap. Just like when the kids were babes...a morning and afternoon nap. What more can you ask for?
Ok, that was kinda hard with two N's but I finally completed the task. So, I am going to tag:
Leslie
Stephanie
Misti
1. You have to post these rules before you give the facts.
2. Players, you must list one fact that is somehow relevant to your life for each letter of your middle name. If you don’t have a middle name, use the middle name you would have liked to have had.
3. If you are tagged you need to write your own blog-post containing your own middle name game facts.
4. At the end of your blog-post, you need to choose one person for each letter of your middle name to tag.
#3 is where I am first confused..."post...your own middle name game facts"...does this mean I make up my own rules...OH WAIT...blonde moment..."rules" and "facts" being two totally different things here. "Rules" being 1 - 4 above and "facts" being yet to be determined because I haven't listed my middle name with it's words/"facts" yet. OK I GET IT NOW...SEE JUST GIVE ME A SECOND OR TWO AND I CAN EVENTUALLY CATCH ON!!
BUT...I am still confused on #4, if I tag someone, they have to post to their blog continuing the game. I don't know any other bloggers than myself and the person who tagged me. I suppose, if I tag someone, they can do theirs in e-mail. I'll just send them my blog posting.
MAN - this is TOO hard. I can't handle the pressure! I am so not mainstreamed yet into blogger society.
So, here goes, the "rules" again are:
1. You have to post these rules before you give the facts.
2. Players, you must list one fact that is somehow relevant to your life for each letter of your middle name. If you don’t have a middle name, use the middle name you would have liked to have had.
3. If you are tagged you need to write your own blog-post containing your own middle name game facts.
4. At the end of your blog-post, you need to choose one person for each letter of your middle name to tag.
A - Animals. As in the stuffed variety. I used to collect stuffed animals. I had them all over my head board and even hanging on the wall above my bed. As I've been forced (kicking and screaming) to grow up, over the years, I've only kept the ones that have meaning and let the others go. I wish I could say I gave them to a good charity or something but to be honest, I don't know what ever became of them. Maybe they are on the Isle of Misfit Toys.
N - Naughty. I have an evil twin named, Lola, who says all the naughty things Lori is too nice to say. Lola can come out at any time, tends to swear like a sailor, and is the queen of sarcasism.
N - I was going to cop out and use Nice but that's too easy. So, let's go with Nap. OH, how I love to take me a nap. I don't get them as often since Jace thinks he is too old for them now. A great day would involve more than one nap. Just like when the kids were babes...a morning and afternoon nap. What more can you ask for?
Ok, that was kinda hard with two N's but I finally completed the task. So, I am going to tag:
Leslie
Stephanie
Misti
Tuesday, December 18, 2007
Lunchtime Chat
At lunch the other day the lunch bunch was talking...let me just preface this with saying that MANY, MANY a lunchtime conversation have taken a serious downward turn...into the gutter that is...often in record time no less...
Anyway, I was talking about how I'm not sure the alarm clock I got my niece for Chrsitmas was the exact one my brother had dictated to me. A member of the lunch bunch wanted to know if I told him I wasn't a "dic-taker". To which I swiftly replied..."I don't know if I want to go on record with that statement at this time!" HAHAHAHAHAHA!
I mean, I'm not even divorced yet, give a girl a chance to bounce back before she gives up on Dick (or Tom or Harry or Matt or Bob or Steve or Pete or the Hells Angels or the Boys Tabernacle Choir - oh wait that's just wrong!).
Anyway, I was talking about how I'm not sure the alarm clock I got my niece for Chrsitmas was the exact one my brother had dictated to me. A member of the lunch bunch wanted to know if I told him I wasn't a "dic-taker". To which I swiftly replied..."I don't know if I want to go on record with that statement at this time!" HAHAHAHAHAHA!
I mean, I'm not even divorced yet, give a girl a chance to bounce back before she gives up on Dick (or Tom or Harry or Matt or Bob or Steve or Pete or the Hells Angels or the Boys Tabernacle Choir - oh wait that's just wrong!).
Monday, December 17, 2007
Pardon the interruption...
Do you now an interupter? You know that person who when you are talking butts in to either...
1) say how that same thing happened to them or someone in their family only much worse or much better whichever the case may be.
- or -
2) say something completely off track that has nothing to do with what you were saying
- or - I almost forgot this one...
3) to talk to someone else in the room (or yell at their kids)
Now I can see how occasionally it's unavoidable or a slip of good conscious (not to mention social decency) to interrupt. And I admit I have been guilty of it myself from time to time. BUT the difference between myself and this other socially inept mutant is that I feel bad afterward, apologize for interupting and politely let the person finish as soon as I am done (ha).
What gets me is the interupter who not only interupts once in a single converstion but continues to do so to the point that you NEVER finish what you were saying and they NEVER notice. They were never invested in what you were saying whatsoever. They are so obsessively narcissistic that they never give the lead back to you. No "I'm sorry, what were you saying" or "Oh I didn't mean to interrupt, go on". The worse head cases will go on and on with their interuption and then say, "where was I going with this". At this point, you are willing to jab them in the eye with a screwdriver to get them to shut up. But no, being the beacon of Emily Post rules of etiquette that you are, you listen intently while visions of them choking on their last breathe dance in your head and then you finally get a word in which is of course "I'm sorry, what were you saying".
We now return you to your regularly scheduled program.
1) say how that same thing happened to them or someone in their family only much worse or much better whichever the case may be.
- or -
2) say something completely off track that has nothing to do with what you were saying
- or - I almost forgot this one...
3) to talk to someone else in the room (or yell at their kids)
Now I can see how occasionally it's unavoidable or a slip of good conscious (not to mention social decency) to interrupt. And I admit I have been guilty of it myself from time to time. BUT the difference between myself and this other socially inept mutant is that I feel bad afterward, apologize for interupting and politely let the person finish as soon as I am done (ha).
What gets me is the interupter who not only interupts once in a single converstion but continues to do so to the point that you NEVER finish what you were saying and they NEVER notice. They were never invested in what you were saying whatsoever. They are so obsessively narcissistic that they never give the lead back to you. No "I'm sorry, what were you saying" or "Oh I didn't mean to interrupt, go on". The worse head cases will go on and on with their interuption and then say, "where was I going with this". At this point, you are willing to jab them in the eye with a screwdriver to get them to shut up. But no, being the beacon of Emily Post rules of etiquette that you are, you listen intently while visions of them choking on their last breathe dance in your head and then you finally get a word in which is of course "I'm sorry, what were you saying".
We now return you to your regularly scheduled program.
Wednesday, December 12, 2007
Losing Weight...
I swear I've got to be losing weight. Good news right?! But it's odd...I'm only losing in my shoulders! I know it sounds weird but it must be because EVERY BRA I CURRENTLY OWN, ALL OF A SUDDEN, THE STRAPS SLIDE OFF MY SHOULDERS CONSTANTLY!!!
It's it a total pain when your bra doesn't fit. I bought (2) new ones at Penney's recently for $30 each (actually it was BOGO - Buy One, Get One) and both of them slip. One of them is SOOO bad, the other day I was wearing it and as the shoulder strap would slip, as soon as I pulled it back up - at that very moment the cup would rise up and my boob would slip out under the underwire. Now, I know that is not the meaning of "underwire" that your boob goes UNDER the wire.
I've never experienced that before - sliding out under the bra. On occassion when wearing an ill-fitting bra, I've had boobs pop out the top - over the cup - but never under the cup! For instance, I learned the hard way that if you are large breasted not to buy a Wonder Bra (the push up kind) a size smaller than you normally wear. Pretty much no chance of those babies staying in there!
Back to the saga of the other day...then when I would adjust the bottom and get my stray boob back where it belonged - at that moment the shoulder strap would fall off again!
It was driving me so crazy I really just wanted to take it off. I seriously was thinking I would be better off. YEAH if they were still 18 year old boobs untouched by the cruel reality of aging and motherhood! Back when they were innocent, perky, full of life, every adventure still ahead of them. Not 38 year old boobs that have seen their better days!
Life (and bras apparently) can be so cruel!
It's it a total pain when your bra doesn't fit. I bought (2) new ones at Penney's recently for $30 each (actually it was BOGO - Buy One, Get One) and both of them slip. One of them is SOOO bad, the other day I was wearing it and as the shoulder strap would slip, as soon as I pulled it back up - at that very moment the cup would rise up and my boob would slip out under the underwire. Now, I know that is not the meaning of "underwire" that your boob goes UNDER the wire.
I've never experienced that before - sliding out under the bra. On occassion when wearing an ill-fitting bra, I've had boobs pop out the top - over the cup - but never under the cup! For instance, I learned the hard way that if you are large breasted not to buy a Wonder Bra (the push up kind) a size smaller than you normally wear. Pretty much no chance of those babies staying in there!
Back to the saga of the other day...then when I would adjust the bottom and get my stray boob back where it belonged - at that moment the shoulder strap would fall off again!
It was driving me so crazy I really just wanted to take it off. I seriously was thinking I would be better off. YEAH if they were still 18 year old boobs untouched by the cruel reality of aging and motherhood! Back when they were innocent, perky, full of life, every adventure still ahead of them. Not 38 year old boobs that have seen their better days!
Life (and bras apparently) can be so cruel!
Sunday, December 09, 2007
Two Teenagers in the house...
Today is Dallas' 13th birthday! Now there are officially two teenagers in the house (although sometimes they act more Jace's age - ha!).
He is at his dad' today so I waited 'til after 10:00 am to call him. I said an enthusiastic HAPPY BIRTHDAY and get no response. He was totally grumpy. I don't know if he just got up, or is feeling like it doesn't really seem like his birthday to him.
He already got his gift from me back in August - a Razor (phone that is for anyone still in the last century).
His dad gave him his gift on Thanksgiving so that he could wear it for good luck during the Cowboys game that day. It was a Marion Barber jersey. You couldn't have wiped the smile off his face when he saw it and put it on. BUT that was a couple weeks ago now so the novelty has worn off.
Since he is at his dad's this weekend - he didn't have his "party" yet. He'll have some friends over next weekend.
And so that we can combine his at Jace's b-days together, we aren't doing cake and ice cream with family 'til next Sunday.
On top of all of that, he came to me a few days ago wanting to have a big boy/girl party like what we offered to Brendon when he turned 13. Brendon originally wanted the big party and later backed out. I guess ever since then...the thought never occurred to me that Dallas should have the same opportunity. That must be why Dallas suffers from Jan Brady (Marcia, Marcia, Marcia) Middle Child Syndrome. Unfortunately, I told him that on such short notice and with money already tight for Christmas, we could not afford that right now. He is really disappointed.
So, once again I get the Mother of the Year award and kids once again show how ungrateful they can be. They have such short term memories when it comes to the great things they do have in their lives. Ahh teenagers...and blessed with two...Christmas came early for me!!!!
He is at his dad' today so I waited 'til after 10:00 am to call him. I said an enthusiastic HAPPY BIRTHDAY and get no response. He was totally grumpy. I don't know if he just got up, or is feeling like it doesn't really seem like his birthday to him.
He already got his gift from me back in August - a Razor (phone that is for anyone still in the last century).
His dad gave him his gift on Thanksgiving so that he could wear it for good luck during the Cowboys game that day. It was a Marion Barber jersey. You couldn't have wiped the smile off his face when he saw it and put it on. BUT that was a couple weeks ago now so the novelty has worn off.
Since he is at his dad's this weekend - he didn't have his "party" yet. He'll have some friends over next weekend.
And so that we can combine his at Jace's b-days together, we aren't doing cake and ice cream with family 'til next Sunday.
On top of all of that, he came to me a few days ago wanting to have a big boy/girl party like what we offered to Brendon when he turned 13. Brendon originally wanted the big party and later backed out. I guess ever since then...the thought never occurred to me that Dallas should have the same opportunity. That must be why Dallas suffers from Jan Brady (Marcia, Marcia, Marcia) Middle Child Syndrome. Unfortunately, I told him that on such short notice and with money already tight for Christmas, we could not afford that right now. He is really disappointed.
So, once again I get the Mother of the Year award and kids once again show how ungrateful they can be. They have such short term memories when it comes to the great things they do have in their lives. Ahh teenagers...and blessed with two...Christmas came early for me!!!!
Ho On the Go
Ahh...I bet you tuned in thinking this was a Santa related post...Ho. Something about Santa being on the go OR Christmas cheer during this busy time of the year. Well...not so much.
I was surfing the net yesterday looking for ideas for our Secret Santa exchange at work. I actually call it Dirty Santa because it's the one were you get to steal someone else's gift if you want.
We have a $20 limit and usually it also needs to be unisex because there are usually a couple token guys (sorry Pat and Rob - hehe). This year there are no guys so that opened up the options a little. Anyway, as I was surfing for ideas, I came across this...
For the Ho on the Go - the original one night stand kit for the modern one night stand. For those nights when you just can't make it home.
Kit includes:
(1) pair of thong underwear
(2) condoms
(1) mini toothbrush
(1) mini toothpaste
(1) moist towelette
Now I didn't really see this being a fitting gift for anyone in the exchange at work. None of my other (grown up) friends for that matter but it still struck me as funny. Where was this 10 - 15 years ago when it could have been a practical gift?!
I was surfing the net yesterday looking for ideas for our Secret Santa exchange at work. I actually call it Dirty Santa because it's the one were you get to steal someone else's gift if you want.
We have a $20 limit and usually it also needs to be unisex because there are usually a couple token guys (sorry Pat and Rob - hehe). This year there are no guys so that opened up the options a little. Anyway, as I was surfing for ideas, I came across this...
For the Ho on the Go - the original one night stand kit for the modern one night stand. For those nights when you just can't make it home.
Kit includes:
(1) pair of thong underwear
(2) condoms
(1) mini toothbrush
(1) mini toothpaste
(1) moist towelette
Now I didn't really see this being a fitting gift for anyone in the exchange at work. None of my other (grown up) friends for that matter but it still struck me as funny. Where was this 10 - 15 years ago when it could have been a practical gift?!
Saturday, December 08, 2007
Can't beat these gas prices...
Last night after book club, where Before Women Had Wings was discussed over food and drinks, and after picking Jace up from my brother & sister-in-law's I needed to get gas. I pulled into the Quik Trip...nay Road Ranger. There were a couple cars at the pumps already and I pulled in between them. I wanted to pay inside because I also wanted to stock up on a couple sodas for the mornng. So, I selected PAY INSIDE CREDIT on the pump. I really was paying with my debit card but PAY INSIDE DEBIT was not an option.
Wait...let me go back a little...I was wondering why the pump wasn't asking me which payment option I wanted on the screen like it normally does. It already was to the point where it tells you to pick up the nozzle and lift the handle. Ok, so I pushed the PAY INSIDE CREDIT button that is near the number pad. It was slow reacting but finally the screen changed and said $7.00 Prepaid. I thought GREAT - somehow I selected some option that only allowed me to put in $7.00 worth. I wondered why the heck would they pick that crazy odd amount as a limit when you want to PAY INSIDE CREDIT. I just said screw it, $7.00 is enough for now - I'll get more gas tomorrow. It pumped in the $7.00 and the pump shut off.
But wait a second...something still seemed a miss here...the pump went back to the start screen asking me to select a payment method. I decided to start over and go ahead and fill up. I was starting to suspect someone screwed up...someone pre-paid (for $7.00) and then didn't actually pump it. So, this time I selected PAY OUTSIDE DEBIT because I didn't want to go inside and face the cashier if they had put 2 and 2 together and accuse me of scamming them. My sodas could wait - I had a 2 liter of Diet Mt Dew at home and that would get me through the night (as it has many a night - ha).
As I was pumping (again), I noticed the car on the same island as me, which had already been there when I pulled in, it's driver had walked inside (I figured to pay and go on his way) and now was on his way back to his car. He was on his cell phone and I had not pushed 1 for English so I couldn't understand him. By now I had put 4 and 4 together and determined HE was the one who had prepaid for $7.00 and the cashier inside screwed up and posted the prepayment to pump 3 (mine) instead of pump 4 (his). The whole time he had been standing there waiting to be able to pump his $7.00 worth...that $7.00 was being pump into my truck.
At this point, I decided NOT to fill up - to cut my losses and get the hell out of there! I stopped my pump at $20. Thank God I had selected PAY OUTSIDE DEBIT so all I had to do was slap my gas cap back on, jump in and peel out...inconspicuously of course. I fumbled with the gas cap at feverish pace as if I were calf roping in a rodeo and once it was screwed in tightly I could throw my hands up in the air signaling the judges to stop the clock and give me my score. Cap in place, I jumped in, quickly looked inside the building - scanning the faces of the workers to see if they had any inclining as to what just happened and then...I put the petal to the metal.
There was a car in front of me waiting to pull out in traffic and when it was my turn I had to wait for oncoming cars before I could safely pull across the lanes. Panic was setting in...I thought I was busted for sure! I thought about turning the opposite direction just to get going and get out of view. The last thing I wanted was for them to get a description of my vehicle or my license plate #. Ever see those pictures on the gas pump of the Iowa State Trooper saying that if you don't pay for your gas you can loose your license? SC-AAAR-RRYYY!!!
I got down the road was still basking in the glory of free gas when I realized at $2.84 a gallon my coo amounted to all of 2.46 gallons of gas. Still, it was a victory over price gouging every where!
Wait...let me go back a little...I was wondering why the pump wasn't asking me which payment option I wanted on the screen like it normally does. It already was to the point where it tells you to pick up the nozzle and lift the handle. Ok, so I pushed the PAY INSIDE CREDIT button that is near the number pad. It was slow reacting but finally the screen changed and said $7.00 Prepaid. I thought GREAT - somehow I selected some option that only allowed me to put in $7.00 worth. I wondered why the heck would they pick that crazy odd amount as a limit when you want to PAY INSIDE CREDIT. I just said screw it, $7.00 is enough for now - I'll get more gas tomorrow. It pumped in the $7.00 and the pump shut off.
But wait a second...something still seemed a miss here...the pump went back to the start screen asking me to select a payment method. I decided to start over and go ahead and fill up. I was starting to suspect someone screwed up...someone pre-paid (for $7.00) and then didn't actually pump it. So, this time I selected PAY OUTSIDE DEBIT because I didn't want to go inside and face the cashier if they had put 2 and 2 together and accuse me of scamming them. My sodas could wait - I had a 2 liter of Diet Mt Dew at home and that would get me through the night (as it has many a night - ha).
As I was pumping (again), I noticed the car on the same island as me, which had already been there when I pulled in, it's driver had walked inside (I figured to pay and go on his way) and now was on his way back to his car. He was on his cell phone and I had not pushed 1 for English so I couldn't understand him. By now I had put 4 and 4 together and determined HE was the one who had prepaid for $7.00 and the cashier inside screwed up and posted the prepayment to pump 3 (mine) instead of pump 4 (his). The whole time he had been standing there waiting to be able to pump his $7.00 worth...that $7.00 was being pump into my truck.
At this point, I decided NOT to fill up - to cut my losses and get the hell out of there! I stopped my pump at $20. Thank God I had selected PAY OUTSIDE DEBIT so all I had to do was slap my gas cap back on, jump in and peel out...inconspicuously of course. I fumbled with the gas cap at feverish pace as if I were calf roping in a rodeo and once it was screwed in tightly I could throw my hands up in the air signaling the judges to stop the clock and give me my score. Cap in place, I jumped in, quickly looked inside the building - scanning the faces of the workers to see if they had any inclining as to what just happened and then...I put the petal to the metal.
There was a car in front of me waiting to pull out in traffic and when it was my turn I had to wait for oncoming cars before I could safely pull across the lanes. Panic was setting in...I thought I was busted for sure! I thought about turning the opposite direction just to get going and get out of view. The last thing I wanted was for them to get a description of my vehicle or my license plate #. Ever see those pictures on the gas pump of the Iowa State Trooper saying that if you don't pay for your gas you can loose your license? SC-AAAR-RRYYY!!!
I got down the road was still basking in the glory of free gas when I realized at $2.84 a gallon my coo amounted to all of 2.46 gallons of gas. Still, it was a victory over price gouging every where!
Sunday, December 02, 2007
O' Christmas Tree, O' Christmas Tree
Amazing how putting up the Christmas tree can make you feel so much better. My whole day has been a lot more productive than yesterday. I did the work I couldn't bring myself to do yesterday, then I finished the tree. We have a big pre-lit tree and I LOVE it. Until today though it was up but not decorated. I put on the garland, first a big silver one then a smaller gold one with little stars. Then the ornaments. Since there are so many lights, I don't have to use many ornaments. I start with all the ones that have meaning - the ones the kids have made in school, ones made for me with the kid's initials, the angels in our birthstone colors, the fluffy cat that reminds me of my aunt, etc. Then I add the miscellaneous ones that are just my favorites for some reason - cute mostly. Then I add the some of the traditional colored round ones. Then I fill in the wholes with some ceramic like ones that are Christmas themed little statues, like a Santa, a toy train, a toy solider, a rocking horse, a fireplace, an angel. I put that angel one toward the top of the tree because they boys won't let me put my big lit angel on. They like the star better. The star is up there but not lit yet. Need to find an extension cord. Whoever invented prelit trees should have made it so that the tree topper can plug into the tree. Maybe they do but I have never seen where. Of course Ken always puts the tree together for me (this year was no different) so maybe he never saw it. Oh and the final touches, just a few icicles. Dallas had asked me not to use those this year because they are annoying when they fall off and stick to your feet. Silly boy.
Anyway, decorating the tree has always been my most treasured Christmas memory. I loved decorating the tree with my mom. She always did the lights and garland and I did the ornaments. She would tell me where holes needed to be filled in and such. I remember Brendon's 2nd Christmas, Dallas' first, I wrote her a poemy letter about those memories. Typed it up, framed it, and gave it to her for Christmas that year. She displayed it for a couple Christmases but I think it's in a drawer somewhere now. I feel kinda guilty I didn't wait for the boys to come home to help with the ornaments. They always give up helping every year anyway because my OCD would kick in and I would micromange every placement. Not too many of the same color in the same place, none too close to one another, etc.
Last year I started laying claim to some of my mom's holiday decorations. I wasn't trying to dampen the mood or anything but I just wanted her to know which ones meant a lot to me and that I would like to have them...someday...ummm...when she was gone. She understood my intention and even went ahead and gave me the nativity scene I had mentioned. She hadn't put it out for years so she wanted me to go ahead and have it. It's on my tv right now. It's big - one of the 3 wisemen is as big as my foot (yes, I measured) - and even though I have small feet, that is still pretty big. It's from Home Interiors and the only thing missing is the stable/manger but I still love it.
Manger - "Away in the manger no crib for a bed. The little lord Jesus lay down his sweet head. The stars in the sky look down where he lay. The little lord Jesus asleep on the hay". Another Christmas memory. My mom and my grandmother (I think my aunt as well) had the same Christmas carol book with the sheet music and illustrations. I don't know how to read music but I did know one set of keys from low C to high C or something like that. My grandmother wrote in the letters of the keys for me on "Away in the Manger" and when we'd go to her house (in Missouri) for Christmas, I would play it on the piano and sing along. Not in front of the whole family or anything on the night we opened gifts, just throughout the visit as my grandmother would either be busy in the adjoining kitchen or sitting in her green rocking chair right behind me. So, I told my momther that that music book of Christmas carols is another thing I'd like to have someday. I really wish I knew what happened to my grandmother's with those notes written in for me but I remember it like yesterday none the less.
So, the Christmas spirit has gotten hold of me today. The next feat is to make sure there are presents under that tree in 22 days. Better start on my letter to Santa.
Anyway, decorating the tree has always been my most treasured Christmas memory. I loved decorating the tree with my mom. She always did the lights and garland and I did the ornaments. She would tell me where holes needed to be filled in and such. I remember Brendon's 2nd Christmas, Dallas' first, I wrote her a poemy letter about those memories. Typed it up, framed it, and gave it to her for Christmas that year. She displayed it for a couple Christmases but I think it's in a drawer somewhere now. I feel kinda guilty I didn't wait for the boys to come home to help with the ornaments. They always give up helping every year anyway because my OCD would kick in and I would micromange every placement. Not too many of the same color in the same place, none too close to one another, etc.
Last year I started laying claim to some of my mom's holiday decorations. I wasn't trying to dampen the mood or anything but I just wanted her to know which ones meant a lot to me and that I would like to have them...someday...ummm...when she was gone. She understood my intention and even went ahead and gave me the nativity scene I had mentioned. She hadn't put it out for years so she wanted me to go ahead and have it. It's on my tv right now. It's big - one of the 3 wisemen is as big as my foot (yes, I measured) - and even though I have small feet, that is still pretty big. It's from Home Interiors and the only thing missing is the stable/manger but I still love it.
Manger - "Away in the manger no crib for a bed. The little lord Jesus lay down his sweet head. The stars in the sky look down where he lay. The little lord Jesus asleep on the hay". Another Christmas memory. My mom and my grandmother (I think my aunt as well) had the same Christmas carol book with the sheet music and illustrations. I don't know how to read music but I did know one set of keys from low C to high C or something like that. My grandmother wrote in the letters of the keys for me on "Away in the Manger" and when we'd go to her house (in Missouri) for Christmas, I would play it on the piano and sing along. Not in front of the whole family or anything on the night we opened gifts, just throughout the visit as my grandmother would either be busy in the adjoining kitchen or sitting in her green rocking chair right behind me. So, I told my momther that that music book of Christmas carols is another thing I'd like to have someday. I really wish I knew what happened to my grandmother's with those notes written in for me but I remember it like yesterday none the less.
So, the Christmas spirit has gotten hold of me today. The next feat is to make sure there are presents under that tree in 22 days. Better start on my letter to Santa.
Saturday, December 01, 2007
stream of consciousness...
Oh the weather outside is frightful, but inside it's so insightful, outside the ice and snow is falling and no friends are coming calling...I am soooo bored...sitting around with nothing to do but think...contempating the differences, if any, between lonliness and Alonliness. Looking at my bare Christmas tree that for now is as empty as I feel - for now. Fueling myself today with butter sandwiches and burnt peanut butter chocolate chip cookies. Watching Janet find her prince charming in one Eddie Lateca on October Road isn't helping. Hey but I am happy for her. My boys are away and I miss them. I always look forward to some down time, some quiet time when they go for weekends to their dads' but the truth is I have my fill of that by the end of the first night. I spend the rest of the time missing their smiles and laughter and five minutes after they get home I'm cursing them for fighting or tormenating. Jumped up this morning at the first sound of sleet hitting my window knowing I had to go pay my rent today. Don't want to pay any late fees ($10 a day you know) or the $50 court cost for the 3 day notice to evict. (Hmmm - wonder how I know how much the fees are?) Rent...on a cold, cold place. It's cold outside...cold inside...the windows are drafty, there is a gap in the front door frame, no storm door, no one to cuddle under a blanket on the couch with. I am systematically going through my dvr. First Big Shots, then Desperate Housewives, then Samantha Who, then October Rd, now Gossip Girl, soon Life, followed by Dirty Sexy Money, then ER, oh and another Big Shots. Thinking of treking to the mailbox knowing it's probably full of overdue notices but really wondering if possibly there is a Soap Opera Digest. I can trivally scan through that for about an hour. Not much more substance than that anywhere to be found. Finished my book for book club last night..."Before Women Had Wings"...it's a story of unconditional love for your parents despite an abusive, nay traumatic childhood. Probably should leave that one alone. My favorite part of the book...the main character, Bird, was describing an old woman she had become friends with, her solice from the abusive mother, and although the woman was black the rest of the description made me think of my maternal grandmother. Fond memories but made me miss for the summers I spent with her. The sleet is really pounding now. The heat just kicked on. Can forced air heat warm the soul? It's dark. Only the lights of the tv, the tree, and the blinds occassionally moving in the breeze. I liked reading again. I found my favorite spot to read was curled up in the opposite corner of the couch under the lamp, book on arm of couch, something to drink on the end table. That's where I finished the book. I should read more. Good thing the book club came up. Something to have going on. Can't wait 'til my scented book marks come - should prove even more enjoyable. Should be working right now. Could use the distraction (could use the money) but can't bring myself to dig it out. Makes me tired. Should get over that - tiredness that is - if I'm going to work a 2nd job sleep will be a thing of the past. I have an application for the Casey's by my house. I've had it for a couple weeks now. Haven't filled it out. Too scared. Scared I am too lazy to work 2 jobs, scared I can't phycially do it, scared to leave my kids to do it, scared of what it will do to me to do it, scared of what it will do to us if I don't do it. You know how in the movies when people are scared they don't move. I get that. All those scary reasons equals doing nothing at all. Doing nothing at all equals being in denial. Being in denial equals things get worse and worse. Things getting worse knowing you could make them better. Knowing you could make things better and don't equals shame. Shame equals silence. Silence equals no one knows. No one knows equals alone. Alone equals nothing. Nothing equals me. Me equals trouble. Trouble equals scared. Scared equals swirling all around in all of that all over and over again and again and again. Again equals endless. Endless equals hopeless. Hopeless equals me. Me equals nothing. Nothing equals me. THE END. That's what I say when I read books to Jace. Even if it's not written on the page. I always finish with an enthusastic THE END. Now he says it too. We hit the last page and he bursts THE END. Funny huh?! The stream is running low. Loss of thought, loss of content, loss of consciousness. It's late...afternoon that is...probably nap time by now. Yeah...sounds good...nap it is.
Thursday, November 22, 2007
What's in the water...
Anyone reading this locally knows about the boil order issued yesterday that the city water in some areas was contaminated and not safe for drinking, cooking, or even brushing your teeth. I was reading on channel 9's website about the boil order being lifted already. As I was reading this line...
"...The advisory was issued as a precautionary measure after an
incident during construction activities caused a short period of
elevated turbidity. ..."
I could not help but read that last word in my mind as "turdidity" and given the situation, that struck me as oddly appropiate! HAHAHA!
"...The advisory was issued as a precautionary measure after an
incident during construction activities caused a short period of
elevated turbidity. ..."
I could not help but read that last word in my mind as "turdidity" and given the situation, that struck me as oddly appropiate! HAHAHA!
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